There's a power in poverty that breaks principalities
And brings the authorities down to their knees
There’s a brewing frustration and ageless temptation
to fight for control by manipulation
The God of the kingdoms and God of Creation and God of the nations
sent this revelation to the homeless and penniless jesus the son
The poor will inherit the kingdom to come
And where will we turn when our world falls apart
And all of the treasures we’ve stored in our barns
Can’t buy the kingdom of God
And who will we praise when we’ve praised all our lives
men who build kingdoms and men who build fame
But Heaven does not know their names
And what are we gonna fear when all that remains
is a God on the throne with a child in His arms and love in his eyes
And the sound of His heart cries… 'Take us away beyond religion, way beyond the minds of man.' "
-JUp
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Saturday, September 20, 2008
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
Made for You by Matt Gilman
Listen:
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendID=393290406
“I will abide in You/Oh come, abide in me/For without You, I can do nothing./ For without You, I can do nothing.
To walk in the cool of the day with You, /To gaze on the beauty of all You do, /
To meditate on Your glorious splendor, /I was made for You.
On You I meditate,/And pray both night and day,/Oh Lord, that I would be with You, where You are./ Oh Lord, that I would be with You, where You are.
To become a lover of God, /To speak face to face/ To know all Your thoughts/ To abide in Your love, /In Your love in me/To keep Your commands, that I may be filled with Joy.
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendID=393290406
“I will abide in You/Oh come, abide in me/For without You, I can do nothing./ For without You, I can do nothing.
To walk in the cool of the day with You, /To gaze on the beauty of all You do, /
To meditate on Your glorious splendor, /I was made for You.
On You I meditate,/And pray both night and day,/Oh Lord, that I would be with You, where You are./ Oh Lord, that I would be with You, where You are.
To become a lover of God, /To speak face to face/ To know all Your thoughts/ To abide in Your love, /In Your love in me/To keep Your commands, that I may be filled with Joy.
Friday, August 29, 2008
good quote
"There is something beautiful about a billion stars held steady by a God who knows what He is doing. (They hang there, the stars, like notes on a page of music, free-form verse, silent mysteries swirling in the blue like jazz.) And as I lay there, it occurred to me that God is up there somewhere. Of course, I had always known He was, but this time I felt it, I realized it, the way a person realizes they are hungry or thirsty. The knowledge of God seeped out of my brain and into my heart. I imagined Him looking down on this earth, half angry because His beloved mankind had cheated on Him, had committed adultery, and yet hopelessly in love with her, drunk with love for her."
— Donald Miller
— Donald Miller
Sunday, August 24, 2008
I don't want to say good-bye...not 'til
Summer is coming to a close. But even though my college classes start tomorrow and fall fashions are already hitting stores, I can't say good-bye. Not yet. Not without asking the last few remaining hours of the season to solidify things in my heart. I don't want to leave without a deeper understanding and comprehension of the lessons I've learned and a fresh appreciation for the friendships I've developed along the way. I don't want to say good-bye until I've learned what it really means to hold the line. and most importantly, how to love more fully.
Never have I had a summer like this. Never have I experienced such conviction of the Holy Spirit and restoration of things that I've felt were broken. I've watched in awe and speechless amazement, as in front of my very eyes, dreams that I thought could never happen began to take place. \
I've also never known what it means to be humbled like I've learned this summer. (And that is a lesson. Because for sure it is not a natural state of the heart. At least not for me). Or to be broken. Or to be honest with myself about what is really in my heart...and to stop pretending like I have all the answers, when in reality I barely have any.
I also never knew what it meant to stand in awe of a God who is more real and more incredible than I ever thought possible. At least not to the degree that this summer has taught. Not really.
Amazing what can happen in just a few months. Incredible to think that just one short period of time can change you in ways that you never imagined...and that just one encounter with someone can shift your destiny into a new place. I'm learning that who I am today is because God has placed really quality individuals in my life. I"m blessed to know and have some of the best friends on the planet. And that isn't flattery. That is truth.
This summer leaves me with questions for God. Questions of why He allows men to build their own kingdoms, using His name as some sort of endorsement line, only to find out that at the end of the day, He alone will be the one who receives the glory.
I think He's been giving me an answer. Well...the start of one, at least. He lets us think we've mastered Him, only to bring a dramatic close to that assumption, bringing us back to our knees, and eventually our face. Because no matter what anyone has said, true revival is not about the signs and wonders. It can never be about a face (except for faces that are facedown). Or a man. Or a name. Or a formula. Or trying to be out of the box, the next big thing, the next "voice in the wilderness", the next "revelator". It can't even be about the certain worship songs that used to make us feel goosebumps because the presence of the Holy Spirit was so strong.
True revival is repentance. It's an on your face posture, in the dirt, between the porch an altar, where hearts are rended, torn apart, and given up to the only One who ever truly deserved our heart and focus in the first place. Why? Because repentance prepares us to meet face to face with Glory Himself. Repentance teaches us what it really means to cry, "HOLY," and to declare, "I am undone, a man of unclean lips, living in a perverse generation."
The truth of it is, we are perverse. Without Jesus, all we can achieve is godlessness. Yet when HE COMES....when HE STEPS DOWN out of heaven...well, let's just say, we haven't seen nothin like Him yet:-) At least not as far as what I read in the Bible. Cause so far what I've tasted would just be settling if I allowed that to be all that I craved after. That has to be more.
MOre Questions. Of why man is so mesmerized by the glitz and glam of the world and of ministries, yet has settled for a definition of fire that has allowed compromise instead of purification. Why do we ask for fire? Why do we think that fire is supposed to be something of splendor? Of course, the result is splendor because Jesus shines forth even more brilliantly. Yet the actual fire is uncomfortable. It is hot. It is humbling. It burns away EVERYTHING that does not please God. If songs can encompass our hearts and work inside of us the message of the hour, then here is one that I am crying out to become,
"You won't relent until You have it all. My heart is Yours." (Misty Edwards)
"So, God, here I am saying that I want you to teach me freshly what You are all about. Yes, that is what I am asking for...this Pastor's kid, who grew up in the church, whose heard all the sermons, learned about the prophetic, apostolic, the "postmodern church", etc. The girl who has sat through Bible classes and has memorized the exact dates of past revivals, as well as the most important Scriptures. (And I"m thankful for those things, because they have been fundamental parts of building me, but yet what goal bringing me towards? Is it to draw me closer to Jesus?) Yes, me. This one who is discovering that despite everything I've learned, sometimes education does more harm than good. sometimes it makes me comfortable. Arrogant. Stale. Way too full and satisfied for my own good. Sometimes it gets me thinking I understand exactly what God's up to and how He is going to accomplish HIs purposes. Or that I have a right to judge my brother, my sister...just because I think maybe I"m more mature. Don't let me leave this summer okay with my old mindsets, my old behaviors, my old ways of doing church, thinking I know what it means to not be religious. HA! In reality, maybe I just became sophisticated in my religiousity. That's even more disgusting! Break into me God! And don't relent....not until you have it all."
Maybe it's wrong to ask for closure in order to transition into what is next. Because some things aren't meant to close, but they are meant to lead you into the next great adventure, the next place of discovery. So, instead of saying good-bye to summer, I am saying thank you, with the full anticipation that what was started in three short months is only the beginning of what can only be called extraordinary. I am walking forward, knowing that God is who I want. I want Him, and I want that desire to not depend on what it will cost. Because He has to be worth it all. I want HIm to be the one who impresses me, who moves my heart, who captures all that I am. I want to fear HIm, and Him alone. I pray that the lessons of the summer and the wisdom gained will be seared upon my heart, and that I will walk into what is next with a greater hunger for His heart and His feelings and His image. I want His name to be seared upon my life...and for Him to not relent until He has all of me.
Never have I had a summer like this. Never have I experienced such conviction of the Holy Spirit and restoration of things that I've felt were broken. I've watched in awe and speechless amazement, as in front of my very eyes, dreams that I thought could never happen began to take place. \
I've also never known what it means to be humbled like I've learned this summer. (And that is a lesson. Because for sure it is not a natural state of the heart. At least not for me). Or to be broken. Or to be honest with myself about what is really in my heart...and to stop pretending like I have all the answers, when in reality I barely have any.
I also never knew what it meant to stand in awe of a God who is more real and more incredible than I ever thought possible. At least not to the degree that this summer has taught. Not really.
Amazing what can happen in just a few months. Incredible to think that just one short period of time can change you in ways that you never imagined...and that just one encounter with someone can shift your destiny into a new place. I'm learning that who I am today is because God has placed really quality individuals in my life. I"m blessed to know and have some of the best friends on the planet. And that isn't flattery. That is truth.
This summer leaves me with questions for God. Questions of why He allows men to build their own kingdoms, using His name as some sort of endorsement line, only to find out that at the end of the day, He alone will be the one who receives the glory.
I think He's been giving me an answer. Well...the start of one, at least. He lets us think we've mastered Him, only to bring a dramatic close to that assumption, bringing us back to our knees, and eventually our face. Because no matter what anyone has said, true revival is not about the signs and wonders. It can never be about a face (except for faces that are facedown). Or a man. Or a name. Or a formula. Or trying to be out of the box, the next big thing, the next "voice in the wilderness", the next "revelator". It can't even be about the certain worship songs that used to make us feel goosebumps because the presence of the Holy Spirit was so strong.
True revival is repentance. It's an on your face posture, in the dirt, between the porch an altar, where hearts are rended, torn apart, and given up to the only One who ever truly deserved our heart and focus in the first place. Why? Because repentance prepares us to meet face to face with Glory Himself. Repentance teaches us what it really means to cry, "HOLY," and to declare, "I am undone, a man of unclean lips, living in a perverse generation."
The truth of it is, we are perverse. Without Jesus, all we can achieve is godlessness. Yet when HE COMES....when HE STEPS DOWN out of heaven...well, let's just say, we haven't seen nothin like Him yet:-) At least not as far as what I read in the Bible. Cause so far what I've tasted would just be settling if I allowed that to be all that I craved after. That has to be more.
MOre Questions. Of why man is so mesmerized by the glitz and glam of the world and of ministries, yet has settled for a definition of fire that has allowed compromise instead of purification. Why do we ask for fire? Why do we think that fire is supposed to be something of splendor? Of course, the result is splendor because Jesus shines forth even more brilliantly. Yet the actual fire is uncomfortable. It is hot. It is humbling. It burns away EVERYTHING that does not please God. If songs can encompass our hearts and work inside of us the message of the hour, then here is one that I am crying out to become,
"You won't relent until You have it all. My heart is Yours." (Misty Edwards)
"So, God, here I am saying that I want you to teach me freshly what You are all about. Yes, that is what I am asking for...this Pastor's kid, who grew up in the church, whose heard all the sermons, learned about the prophetic, apostolic, the "postmodern church", etc. The girl who has sat through Bible classes and has memorized the exact dates of past revivals, as well as the most important Scriptures. (And I"m thankful for those things, because they have been fundamental parts of building me, but yet what goal bringing me towards? Is it to draw me closer to Jesus?) Yes, me. This one who is discovering that despite everything I've learned, sometimes education does more harm than good. sometimes it makes me comfortable. Arrogant. Stale. Way too full and satisfied for my own good. Sometimes it gets me thinking I understand exactly what God's up to and how He is going to accomplish HIs purposes. Or that I have a right to judge my brother, my sister...just because I think maybe I"m more mature. Don't let me leave this summer okay with my old mindsets, my old behaviors, my old ways of doing church, thinking I know what it means to not be religious. HA! In reality, maybe I just became sophisticated in my religiousity. That's even more disgusting! Break into me God! And don't relent....not until you have it all."
Maybe it's wrong to ask for closure in order to transition into what is next. Because some things aren't meant to close, but they are meant to lead you into the next great adventure, the next place of discovery. So, instead of saying good-bye to summer, I am saying thank you, with the full anticipation that what was started in three short months is only the beginning of what can only be called extraordinary. I am walking forward, knowing that God is who I want. I want Him, and I want that desire to not depend on what it will cost. Because He has to be worth it all. I want HIm to be the one who impresses me, who moves my heart, who captures all that I am. I want to fear HIm, and Him alone. I pray that the lessons of the summer and the wisdom gained will be seared upon my heart, and that I will walk into what is next with a greater hunger for His heart and His feelings and His image. I want His name to be seared upon my life...and for Him to not relent until He has all of me.
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
I Chase You, Dawn
written for a friend
Determined
Not to leave this place
Until I leave looking like your face.
Night:
“The time from dusk to dawn when no sunlight is visible.”
Dawn:
“To begin to grow light as the sun rises; To begin to appear or develop; To begin to be perceived or understood.”
I’ve heard it said
Tears may last through the night
Yet rejoicing comes with the new day
So
I chase you dawn,
Through the night
I chase
Knowing something epic pulls me forward
Ambition turns to affection under the shadow
I chase you, until I learn
How to hear
How to see
How to trust
Until I learn what it means to be owned by someone
Someone who is not me
I chase you, dawn
Even when darkness makes no sense
I chase
Restless dreams feel more heavy than alive
Still I run
I chase you dawn
Into the break of day
I chase
Where I glimpse colors I’ve never seen before
And senses come alive after the long night
I chase you, dawn
Into the glory of the morning
I chase
Looking back I see
This journey, though hard,
Has built me
I chase you dawn
Until my heart beats in time
With the message of this night
I chase
Because I must see His face
And I'm not leaving this place
Until
I chase you dawn
Watching the movements of the Maker
I chase
Learning that these words are like fire
Breaking rocks to pieces
I chase you dawn
Until I awake new
I chase
Until I find you
….or maybe it’s you who found me.
Even if I want to give up, I can’t
Some nights are longer than others
But I’ve watched enough sunrises
To know morning always comes
"...The Lord will command His lovingkindness in the daytime, and in the night His song shall be with me- A prayer to the God of my life."
-Psalm 42:8
Determined
Not to leave this place
Until I leave looking like your face.
Night:
“The time from dusk to dawn when no sunlight is visible.”
Dawn:
“To begin to grow light as the sun rises; To begin to appear or develop; To begin to be perceived or understood.”
I’ve heard it said
Tears may last through the night
Yet rejoicing comes with the new day
So
I chase you dawn,
Through the night
I chase
Knowing something epic pulls me forward
Ambition turns to affection under the shadow
I chase you, until I learn
How to hear
How to see
How to trust
Until I learn what it means to be owned by someone
Someone who is not me
I chase you, dawn
Even when darkness makes no sense
I chase
Restless dreams feel more heavy than alive
Still I run
I chase you dawn
Into the break of day
I chase
Where I glimpse colors I’ve never seen before
And senses come alive after the long night
I chase you, dawn
Into the glory of the morning
I chase
Looking back I see
This journey, though hard,
Has built me
I chase you dawn
Until my heart beats in time
With the message of this night
I chase
Because I must see His face
And I'm not leaving this place
Until
I chase you dawn
Watching the movements of the Maker
I chase
Learning that these words are like fire
Breaking rocks to pieces
I chase you dawn
Until I awake new
I chase
Until I find you
….or maybe it’s you who found me.
Even if I want to give up, I can’t
Some nights are longer than others
But I’ve watched enough sunrises
To know morning always comes
"...The Lord will command His lovingkindness in the daytime, and in the night His song shall be with me- A prayer to the God of my life."
-Psalm 42:8
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Ominous (words and music by John Mark McMillan)
Six rounds in the hands of a killer,
I am dangerous in Your arms.
We are the midnight city siren
on the back of wisdom,
Crying against the wasteland boulevard.
I am,
I mean, You are, with me,
I mean, we are, Ominous tonight.
Six strings in the hands of a poet,
I am
poetry in Your eyes.
So light me up with a song
Stain the sky with my burning
And I will not apologize
Cause whose gonna cry if I won't?
Whose gonna shine if I don't?
Whose gonna bring it down?
Where is the hope in thiscrowd of indifferent?
Where is the truth if it's not in my mouth?
I am,
I mean, You are, with me,
Well, we are, Ominous tonight
Six a.m.
In the hands of the morning
I am a skyline
You are the sun
Deep between our meeting
The heavens are receding
And the stars faint one by one
I am
I mean, You are, with me
Well, we are, ominous tonight
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=348108108
I am dangerous in Your arms.
We are the midnight city siren
on the back of wisdom,
Crying against the wasteland boulevard.
I am,
I mean, You are, with me,
I mean, we are, Ominous tonight.
Six strings in the hands of a poet,
I am
poetry in Your eyes.
So light me up with a song
Stain the sky with my burning
And I will not apologize
Cause whose gonna cry if I won't?
Whose gonna shine if I don't?
Whose gonna bring it down?
Where is the hope in thiscrowd of indifferent?
Where is the truth if it's not in my mouth?
I am,
I mean, You are, with me,
Well, we are, Ominous tonight
Six a.m.
In the hands of the morning
I am a skyline
You are the sun
Deep between our meeting
The heavens are receding
And the stars faint one by one
I am
I mean, You are, with me
Well, we are, ominous tonight
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=348108108
Make you feel my love
"For God so loved the world, that He GAVE His one and only son." He wanted the world to feel His love that desperately.
And Jesus, "because of the joy set before Him", despised the shame of the cross. He went to the ends of the earth to make sure that we would feel His love. And He is still longing for us to feel it--for nations to feel His love--for the broken, hurting, misunderstood to know what He did because they were His joy.
As I listened to this song, I kept seeing Jesus and His longing for us to feel His love, and to know that He gave it all so that He could have all of us. Because He loves us, and wants us for His own. He had to have us, no matter what it would cost Him, proving that there is no greater love than to lay down your life for a friend.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-jpzBEiARaE&feature=related
When the rain
Is blowing in your face
And the whole world
Is on your case
I could offer you
A warm embrace
To make you feel my love
When the evening shadows
And the stars appear
And there is no one there
To dry your tears
I could hold you
For a million years
To make you feel my love
I know you
Haven't made
Your mind up yet
But I would never
Do you wrong
I've known it
From the moment
That we met
No doubt in my mind
Where you belong
I'd go hungry
I'd go black and blue
I'd go crawling
Down the avenue
No, there's nothing
That I wouldn't do
To make you feel my love
The storms are raging
On the rolling sea
And on the highway of regret
Though winds of change
Are throwing wild and free
You ain't seen nothing
Like me yet
I could make you happy
Make your dreams come true
Nothing that I wouldn't do
Go to the ends
Of the Earth for you
To make you feel my love
And Jesus, "because of the joy set before Him", despised the shame of the cross. He went to the ends of the earth to make sure that we would feel His love. And He is still longing for us to feel it--for nations to feel His love--for the broken, hurting, misunderstood to know what He did because they were His joy.
As I listened to this song, I kept seeing Jesus and His longing for us to feel His love, and to know that He gave it all so that He could have all of us. Because He loves us, and wants us for His own. He had to have us, no matter what it would cost Him, proving that there is no greater love than to lay down your life for a friend.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-jpzBEiARaE&feature=related
When the rain
Is blowing in your face
And the whole world
Is on your case
I could offer you
A warm embrace
To make you feel my love
When the evening shadows
And the stars appear
And there is no one there
To dry your tears
I could hold you
For a million years
To make you feel my love
I know you
Haven't made
Your mind up yet
But I would never
Do you wrong
I've known it
From the moment
That we met
No doubt in my mind
Where you belong
I'd go hungry
I'd go black and blue
I'd go crawling
Down the avenue
No, there's nothing
That I wouldn't do
To make you feel my love
The storms are raging
On the rolling sea
And on the highway of regret
Though winds of change
Are throwing wild and free
You ain't seen nothing
Like me yet
I could make you happy
Make your dreams come true
Nothing that I wouldn't do
Go to the ends
Of the Earth for you
To make you feel my love
Saturday, August 2, 2008
the first place
Nights like these don’t come often
Pain turns to providence
A single Word becomes a sword
Proceeding from a throne that quickens forth movements
Formed under the cover of night
Where Only One is watching
And No other can understand this desert place
Unless they walked there too
This training ground that looks barren
Yet out of it flows rivers of life
Break
Down. Open
Ground.
Mission uncompromised, no matter how many wished for its failure, placing bets on definite defeat.
They underestimated the power of what called in the first place--
A-B-C-D-E-F-G…..
The teachers taught well
Now Students regurgitate these rote lessons with ease
But these truths—
Will they stick, empowering the moments when freedom is needed most?
Or have they merely become routine
Laid inside the same category as nursery rhymes—
The kind that lull to sleep and comfort into apathy?
Oblivious to the fact that a word makes dead bones become an army
Broken paradigms
Shifted vision
The point was clear once
The passion hot
The focus determined
Yet time proves warriors
Tests come during the weakest points
When the brain clicks into survival
Hungry, thirsty, sweat drenched.
Forgetting how to live from above
Fighting for something that makes sense
Wisdom of God is foolish to man.
Forsaking the romance that called in the first place.
It’s about the first place.
What called to you in the first place?
A word.
shifts.
frames.
A whole world is made.
Like an arrow into the heart of a bulls-eye
Comes this weapon that contends.
Not mere letters put together.
Something alive.
Alive with desire.
Romance.
Love.
Fire. That burns down the barrier lines.
Love wants first place.
has to be first place.
Otherwise the Word means nothing. Even if it still does its job.
Pain turns to providence
A single Word becomes a sword
Proceeding from a throne that quickens forth movements
Formed under the cover of night
Where Only One is watching
And No other can understand this desert place
Unless they walked there too
This training ground that looks barren
Yet out of it flows rivers of life
Break
Down. Open
Ground.
Mission uncompromised, no matter how many wished for its failure, placing bets on definite defeat.
They underestimated the power of what called in the first place--
A-B-C-D-E-F-G…..
The teachers taught well
Now Students regurgitate these rote lessons with ease
But these truths—
Will they stick, empowering the moments when freedom is needed most?
Or have they merely become routine
Laid inside the same category as nursery rhymes—
The kind that lull to sleep and comfort into apathy?
Oblivious to the fact that a word makes dead bones become an army
Broken paradigms
Shifted vision
The point was clear once
The passion hot
The focus determined
Yet time proves warriors
Tests come during the weakest points
When the brain clicks into survival
Hungry, thirsty, sweat drenched.
Forgetting how to live from above
Fighting for something that makes sense
Wisdom of God is foolish to man.
Forsaking the romance that called in the first place.
It’s about the first place.
What called to you in the first place?
A word.
shifts.
frames.
A whole world is made.
Like an arrow into the heart of a bulls-eye
Comes this weapon that contends.
Not mere letters put together.
Something alive.
Alive with desire.
Romance.
Love.
Fire. That burns down the barrier lines.
Love wants first place.
has to be first place.
Otherwise the Word means nothing. Even if it still does its job.
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
A.W. Tozer: The Pursuit of God
The Pursuit of God by A. W. Tozer
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Chapter 1: Following hard after God
My soul followeth hard after thee: thy right hand upholdeth me.
Ps. 63:8
Christian theology teaches the doctrine of prevenient grace, which briefly stated means this, that before a man can seek God, God must first have sought the man. Before a sinful man can think a right thought of God, there must have been a work of enlightenment done within him; imperfect it may be, but a true work nonetheless, and the secret cause of all desiring and seeking and praying which may follow.
We pursue God because, and only because, He has first put an urge within us that spurs us to the pursuit. `No man can come to me,' said our Lord, `except the Father which hath sent me draw him,' and it is by this very prevenient drawing that God takes from us every vestige of credit for he act of coming. The impulse to pursue God originates with God, but the outworking of that impulse is our following hard after Him; and all the time we are pursuing Him we are already in His hand: `Thy right hand upholdeth me.' In this divine `upholding' and human `following' there is no contradiction. All is of God, for as von Hugel teaches, God is always previous.
In practice, however, (that is, where God's previous working meets man's present response) man must pursue God. On our part there must be positive reciprocation if this secret drawing of God is to eventuate in identifiable experience of the Divine. In the warm language of personal feeling this is stated in the Forty-second Psalm: `As the hart panteth after the waterbrooks, so panteth my soul after thee, O God. My soul thirsteth for God, for the living God: when shall I come and appear before God?' This is deep calling unto deep, and the longing heart will understand it.
The doctrine of justification by faith--a Biblical truth, and a blessed relief from sterile legalism and unavailing self-effort--has in our time fallen into evil company and been interpreted by many in such manner as actually to bar men from the knowledge of God. The whole transaction of religious conversion has been made mechanical and spiritless. Faith may now be exercised without a jar to the moral life and without embarrassment to the Adamic ego. Christ may be `received' without creating any special love for Him in the soul of the receiver. The man is `saved,' but he is not hungry nor thirsty after God. In fact he is specifically taught to be satisfied and encouraged to be content with little.
The modern scientist has lost God amid the wonders of His world; we Christians are in real danger of losing God amid the wonders of His Word. We have almost forgotten that God is a Person and, as such, can be cultivated as any person can. It is inherent in personality to be able to know other personalities, but full knowledge of one personality by another cannot be achieved in one encounter. It is only after long and loving mental intercourse that the full possibilities of both can be explored.
All social intercourse between human beings is a response of personality to personality, grading upward from the most casual brush between man and man to the fullest, most intimate communion of which the human soul is capable. Religion, so far as it is genuine, is in essence the response of created personalities to the Creating Personality, God. `This is life eternal, that they might know thee, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent.' (John 17:3)
God is a Person, and in the deep of His mighty nature He thinks, wills, enjoys feels, loves, desires and suffers as any other person may. In making Himself known to us He stays by the familiar pattern of personality. He communicates with us through the avenues of our minds, our wills and our emotions. The continuous and unembarrassed interchange of love and thought between God and the soul of the redeemed man is the throbbing heart of New Testament religion.
This intercourse between God and the soul is known to us in conscious personal awareness. It is personal: that is, it does not come through the body of believers, as such, but is known to the individual, and to the body through the individuals which compose it. And it is conscious: that is, it does not stay below the threshold of consciousness and work there unknown to the soul (as, for instance, infant baptism is thought by some to do), but comes within the field of awareness where the man can `know' it as he knows any other fact of experience.
You and I are in little (our sins excepted) what God is in large. Being made in His image we have within us the capacity to know Him. In our sins we lack only the power. The moment the Spirit has quickened us to life in regeneration our whole being senses its kinship to God and leaps up in joyous recognition. That is the heavenly birth without which we cannot see the Kingdom of God. It is, however, not an end but an inception, for now begins the glorious pursuit, the heart's happy exploration of the infinite riches of the Godhead. That is where we begin, I say, but where we stop no man has yet discovered, for there is in the awful and mysterious depths of the Triune God neither limit nor end.
Shoreless Ocean, who can sound Thee?
Thine own eternity is round Thee,
Majesty divine!
To have found God and still to pursue Him is the soul's paradox of love, scorned indeed by the too-easily- satisfied religionist, but justified in happy experience by the children of the burning heart. St. Bernard stated this holy paradox in a musical quatrain that will be instantly understood by every worshipping soul:
We taste Thee, O Thou Living Bread,
And long to feast upon Thee still:
We drink of Thee, the Fountainhead
And thirst our souls from Thee to fill.
come near to the holy men and women of the past and you will soon feel the heat of their desire after God. They mourned for Him, they prayed and wrestled and sought for Him day and night, in season and out, and when they had found Him the finding was all the sweeter for the long seeking. Moses used the fact that he knew God as an argument for knowing Him better. `Now, therefore, I pray thee, if I have found grace in thy sight, show me now thy way, that I may know thee, that I may find grace in thy sight'; and from there he rose to make the daring request, `I beseech thee, show me thy glory.' God was frankly pleased by this display of ardour, and the next day called Moses into the mount, and there in solemn procession made all His glory pass before him.
David's life was a torrent of spiritual desire, and his psalms ring with the cry of the seeker and the glad shout oft he finder. Paul confessed the mainspring of his life to be his burning desire after Christ. `That I may know Him,' was the goal of his heart, and to this he sacrificed everything. `Yea doubtless, and I count all things but loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord: for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and do count them but refuse, that I may win Christ' (Phil 3:8).
Hymnody is sweet with the longing after God, the God whom, while the singer seeks, he knows he has already found. `His track I see and I'll pursue,' sang our fathers only a short generation ago, but that song is heard no more in the great congregation. How tragic that we in this dark day have had our seeking done for us by our teachers. Everything is made to center upon the initial act of `accepting' Christ (a term, incidentally, which is not found in the Bible) and we are not expected thereafter to crave any further revelation of God to our souls. We have been snared in the coils of a spurious logic which insists that if we have found Him we need no more seek Him. This is set before us as the last word in orthodoxy, and it is taken for granted that no Bible-taught Christian ever believed otherwise. Thus the whole testimony of the worshipping, seeking, singing Church on that subject is crisply set aside. The experiential heart- theology of a grand army of fragrant saints is rejected in favor of a smug interpretation of Scripture which would certainly have sounded strange to an Augustine, a Rutherford or a Branierd.
In the midst of this great chill there are some, I rejoice to acknowledge, who will not be content with shallow logic. They will admit the force of the argument, and then turn away with tears to hunt some lonely place and pray, `O God, show me thy glory.' They want to taste, to touch with their hearts, to see with their inner eyes the wonder that is God.
I want deliberately to encourage this mighty longing after God. The lack of it has brought us to our present low estate. The stiff and wooden quality about our religious lives is a result of our lack of holy desire. Complacency is a deadly foe of all spiritual growth. Acute desire must be present or there will be no manifestation of Christ to His people. He waits to be wanted. Too bad that with many of us He waits so long, so very long, in vain.
Every age has its own characteristics. Right now we are in an age of religious complexity. The simplicity which is in Christ is rarely found among us. In its stead are programs, methods, organizations and a world of nervous activities which occupy time and attention but can never satisfy the longing of the heart. The shallowness of our inner experience, the hollowness of our worship, and the servile imitation of the world which marks our promotional methods all testify that we, in this day, know God only imperfectly, and the peace of God scarcely at all.
If we would find God amid all the religious externals we must first determine to find Him, and then proceed in the way of simplicity. Now as always God discovers Himself to `babes' and hides Himself in thick darkness from the wise and the prudent. We must simplify our approach to Him. We must strip down to essentials (and they will be found to be blessedly few). We must put away all effort to impress, and come with the guileless candor of childhood. If we do this, without doubt God will quickly respond.
When religion has said its last word, there is little that we need other than God Himself. The evil habit of seeking God-and effectively prevents us from finding God in full revelation. In the `and' lies our great woe. If we omit the `and', we shall soon find God, and in Him we shall find that for which we have all our lives been secretly longing.
We need not fear that in seeking God only we may narrow our lives or restrict the motions of our expanding hearts. The opposite is true. We can well afford to make God our All, to concentrate, to sacrifice the many for the One.
The author of the quaint old English classic, The Cloud of Unknowing, teaches us how to do this. `Lift up thine heart unto God with a meek stirring of love; and mean Himself, and none of His goods. And thereto, look thee loath to think on aught but God Himself. So that nought work in thy wit, nor in thy will, but only God Himself. This is the work of the soul that most pleaseth God.'
Again, he recommends that in prayer we practice a further stripping down of everything, even of our theology. `For it sufficeth enough, a naked intent direct unto God without any other cause than Himself.' Yet underneath all his thinking lay the broad foundation of New Testament truth, for he explains that by `Himself' he means `God that made thee, and bought thee, and that graciously called thee to thy degree.' And he is all for simplicity: If we would have religion `lapped and folden in one word, for that thou shouldst have better hold thereupon, take thee but a little word of one syllable: for so it is better than of two, for even the shorter it is the better it accordeth with the work of the Spirit. And such a word is this word God or this word love.'
When the Lord divided Canaan among the tribes of Israel, Levi received no share of the land. God said to him simply, `I am thy part and thine inheritance,' and by those words made him richer than all his brethren, richer than all the kings and rajas who have ever lived in the world. And there is a spiritual principle here, a principle still valid for every priest of the Most High God.
The man who has God for his treasure has all things in One. Many ordinary treasures may be denied him, or if he is allowed to have them, the enjoyment of them will be so tempered that they will never be necessary to his happiness. Or if he must see them go, one after one, he will scarcely feel a sense of loss, for having the Source of all things he has in One all satisfaction, all pleasure, all delight. Whatever he may lose he has actually lost nothing, for he now has it all in One, and he has it purely, legitimately and forever.
O God, I have tasted Thy goodness, and it has both satisfied me and made me thirsty for more. I am painfully conscious of my need of further grace. I am ashamed of my lack of desire. O God, the Triune God, I want to want Thee; I long to be filled with longing; I thirst to be made more thirsty still. Show me Thy glory, I pray Thee, that so I may know Thee indeed. Begin in mercy a new work of love within me. Say to my soul, `Rise up, my love, my fair one, and come away.' Then give me grace to rise and follow Thee up from this misty lowland where I have wandered so long. In Jesus' name, Amen.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Chapter 1: Following hard after God
My soul followeth hard after thee: thy right hand upholdeth me.
Ps. 63:8
Christian theology teaches the doctrine of prevenient grace, which briefly stated means this, that before a man can seek God, God must first have sought the man. Before a sinful man can think a right thought of God, there must have been a work of enlightenment done within him; imperfect it may be, but a true work nonetheless, and the secret cause of all desiring and seeking and praying which may follow.
We pursue God because, and only because, He has first put an urge within us that spurs us to the pursuit. `No man can come to me,' said our Lord, `except the Father which hath sent me draw him,' and it is by this very prevenient drawing that God takes from us every vestige of credit for he act of coming. The impulse to pursue God originates with God, but the outworking of that impulse is our following hard after Him; and all the time we are pursuing Him we are already in His hand: `Thy right hand upholdeth me.' In this divine `upholding' and human `following' there is no contradiction. All is of God, for as von Hugel teaches, God is always previous.
In practice, however, (that is, where God's previous working meets man's present response) man must pursue God. On our part there must be positive reciprocation if this secret drawing of God is to eventuate in identifiable experience of the Divine. In the warm language of personal feeling this is stated in the Forty-second Psalm: `As the hart panteth after the waterbrooks, so panteth my soul after thee, O God. My soul thirsteth for God, for the living God: when shall I come and appear before God?' This is deep calling unto deep, and the longing heart will understand it.
The doctrine of justification by faith--a Biblical truth, and a blessed relief from sterile legalism and unavailing self-effort--has in our time fallen into evil company and been interpreted by many in such manner as actually to bar men from the knowledge of God. The whole transaction of religious conversion has been made mechanical and spiritless. Faith may now be exercised without a jar to the moral life and without embarrassment to the Adamic ego. Christ may be `received' without creating any special love for Him in the soul of the receiver. The man is `saved,' but he is not hungry nor thirsty after God. In fact he is specifically taught to be satisfied and encouraged to be content with little.
The modern scientist has lost God amid the wonders of His world; we Christians are in real danger of losing God amid the wonders of His Word. We have almost forgotten that God is a Person and, as such, can be cultivated as any person can. It is inherent in personality to be able to know other personalities, but full knowledge of one personality by another cannot be achieved in one encounter. It is only after long and loving mental intercourse that the full possibilities of both can be explored.
All social intercourse between human beings is a response of personality to personality, grading upward from the most casual brush between man and man to the fullest, most intimate communion of which the human soul is capable. Religion, so far as it is genuine, is in essence the response of created personalities to the Creating Personality, God. `This is life eternal, that they might know thee, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent.' (John 17:3)
God is a Person, and in the deep of His mighty nature He thinks, wills, enjoys feels, loves, desires and suffers as any other person may. In making Himself known to us He stays by the familiar pattern of personality. He communicates with us through the avenues of our minds, our wills and our emotions. The continuous and unembarrassed interchange of love and thought between God and the soul of the redeemed man is the throbbing heart of New Testament religion.
This intercourse between God and the soul is known to us in conscious personal awareness. It is personal: that is, it does not come through the body of believers, as such, but is known to the individual, and to the body through the individuals which compose it. And it is conscious: that is, it does not stay below the threshold of consciousness and work there unknown to the soul (as, for instance, infant baptism is thought by some to do), but comes within the field of awareness where the man can `know' it as he knows any other fact of experience.
You and I are in little (our sins excepted) what God is in large. Being made in His image we have within us the capacity to know Him. In our sins we lack only the power. The moment the Spirit has quickened us to life in regeneration our whole being senses its kinship to God and leaps up in joyous recognition. That is the heavenly birth without which we cannot see the Kingdom of God. It is, however, not an end but an inception, for now begins the glorious pursuit, the heart's happy exploration of the infinite riches of the Godhead. That is where we begin, I say, but where we stop no man has yet discovered, for there is in the awful and mysterious depths of the Triune God neither limit nor end.
Shoreless Ocean, who can sound Thee?
Thine own eternity is round Thee,
Majesty divine!
To have found God and still to pursue Him is the soul's paradox of love, scorned indeed by the too-easily- satisfied religionist, but justified in happy experience by the children of the burning heart. St. Bernard stated this holy paradox in a musical quatrain that will be instantly understood by every worshipping soul:
We taste Thee, O Thou Living Bread,
And long to feast upon Thee still:
We drink of Thee, the Fountainhead
And thirst our souls from Thee to fill.
come near to the holy men and women of the past and you will soon feel the heat of their desire after God. They mourned for Him, they prayed and wrestled and sought for Him day and night, in season and out, and when they had found Him the finding was all the sweeter for the long seeking. Moses used the fact that he knew God as an argument for knowing Him better. `Now, therefore, I pray thee, if I have found grace in thy sight, show me now thy way, that I may know thee, that I may find grace in thy sight'; and from there he rose to make the daring request, `I beseech thee, show me thy glory.' God was frankly pleased by this display of ardour, and the next day called Moses into the mount, and there in solemn procession made all His glory pass before him.
David's life was a torrent of spiritual desire, and his psalms ring with the cry of the seeker and the glad shout oft he finder. Paul confessed the mainspring of his life to be his burning desire after Christ. `That I may know Him,' was the goal of his heart, and to this he sacrificed everything. `Yea doubtless, and I count all things but loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord: for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and do count them but refuse, that I may win Christ' (Phil 3:8).
Hymnody is sweet with the longing after God, the God whom, while the singer seeks, he knows he has already found. `His track I see and I'll pursue,' sang our fathers only a short generation ago, but that song is heard no more in the great congregation. How tragic that we in this dark day have had our seeking done for us by our teachers. Everything is made to center upon the initial act of `accepting' Christ (a term, incidentally, which is not found in the Bible) and we are not expected thereafter to crave any further revelation of God to our souls. We have been snared in the coils of a spurious logic which insists that if we have found Him we need no more seek Him. This is set before us as the last word in orthodoxy, and it is taken for granted that no Bible-taught Christian ever believed otherwise. Thus the whole testimony of the worshipping, seeking, singing Church on that subject is crisply set aside. The experiential heart- theology of a grand army of fragrant saints is rejected in favor of a smug interpretation of Scripture which would certainly have sounded strange to an Augustine, a Rutherford or a Branierd.
In the midst of this great chill there are some, I rejoice to acknowledge, who will not be content with shallow logic. They will admit the force of the argument, and then turn away with tears to hunt some lonely place and pray, `O God, show me thy glory.' They want to taste, to touch with their hearts, to see with their inner eyes the wonder that is God.
I want deliberately to encourage this mighty longing after God. The lack of it has brought us to our present low estate. The stiff and wooden quality about our religious lives is a result of our lack of holy desire. Complacency is a deadly foe of all spiritual growth. Acute desire must be present or there will be no manifestation of Christ to His people. He waits to be wanted. Too bad that with many of us He waits so long, so very long, in vain.
Every age has its own characteristics. Right now we are in an age of religious complexity. The simplicity which is in Christ is rarely found among us. In its stead are programs, methods, organizations and a world of nervous activities which occupy time and attention but can never satisfy the longing of the heart. The shallowness of our inner experience, the hollowness of our worship, and the servile imitation of the world which marks our promotional methods all testify that we, in this day, know God only imperfectly, and the peace of God scarcely at all.
If we would find God amid all the religious externals we must first determine to find Him, and then proceed in the way of simplicity. Now as always God discovers Himself to `babes' and hides Himself in thick darkness from the wise and the prudent. We must simplify our approach to Him. We must strip down to essentials (and they will be found to be blessedly few). We must put away all effort to impress, and come with the guileless candor of childhood. If we do this, without doubt God will quickly respond.
When religion has said its last word, there is little that we need other than God Himself. The evil habit of seeking God-and effectively prevents us from finding God in full revelation. In the `and' lies our great woe. If we omit the `and', we shall soon find God, and in Him we shall find that for which we have all our lives been secretly longing.
We need not fear that in seeking God only we may narrow our lives or restrict the motions of our expanding hearts. The opposite is true. We can well afford to make God our All, to concentrate, to sacrifice the many for the One.
The author of the quaint old English classic, The Cloud of Unknowing, teaches us how to do this. `Lift up thine heart unto God with a meek stirring of love; and mean Himself, and none of His goods. And thereto, look thee loath to think on aught but God Himself. So that nought work in thy wit, nor in thy will, but only God Himself. This is the work of the soul that most pleaseth God.'
Again, he recommends that in prayer we practice a further stripping down of everything, even of our theology. `For it sufficeth enough, a naked intent direct unto God without any other cause than Himself.' Yet underneath all his thinking lay the broad foundation of New Testament truth, for he explains that by `Himself' he means `God that made thee, and bought thee, and that graciously called thee to thy degree.' And he is all for simplicity: If we would have religion `lapped and folden in one word, for that thou shouldst have better hold thereupon, take thee but a little word of one syllable: for so it is better than of two, for even the shorter it is the better it accordeth with the work of the Spirit. And such a word is this word God or this word love.'
When the Lord divided Canaan among the tribes of Israel, Levi received no share of the land. God said to him simply, `I am thy part and thine inheritance,' and by those words made him richer than all his brethren, richer than all the kings and rajas who have ever lived in the world. And there is a spiritual principle here, a principle still valid for every priest of the Most High God.
The man who has God for his treasure has all things in One. Many ordinary treasures may be denied him, or if he is allowed to have them, the enjoyment of them will be so tempered that they will never be necessary to his happiness. Or if he must see them go, one after one, he will scarcely feel a sense of loss, for having the Source of all things he has in One all satisfaction, all pleasure, all delight. Whatever he may lose he has actually lost nothing, for he now has it all in One, and he has it purely, legitimately and forever.
O God, I have tasted Thy goodness, and it has both satisfied me and made me thirsty for more. I am painfully conscious of my need of further grace. I am ashamed of my lack of desire. O God, the Triune God, I want to want Thee; I long to be filled with longing; I thirst to be made more thirsty still. Show me Thy glory, I pray Thee, that so I may know Thee indeed. Begin in mercy a new work of love within me. Say to my soul, `Rise up, my love, my fair one, and come away.' Then give me grace to rise and follow Thee up from this misty lowland where I have wandered so long. In Jesus' name, Amen.
Thursday, July 10, 2008
quote
“But there’s one more thing to be said, even so. Suppose we have only dreamed, or made up, all those things—trees and grass and sun and moon and stars and Aslan himself. Suppose we have. Then all I can say is that, in that case, the made-up things seem a good deal more important than the real ones. Suppose this black pit of a kingdom of yours is the only world. Well, it strikes me as a pretty poor one. We’re just babies making up a game, if you’re right. But four babies playing a game can make a play-world which licks your real world hollow. That’s why I’m going to stand by the play-world. I’m on Aslan’s side even if there isn’t any Aslan to lead it. I’m going to live as like a Narnian as I can even if there isn’t any Narnia. […] Not that our lives will be very long, I should think; but that’s a small loss if the world’s as dull a place as you say.” [Puddleglum] -C.S. Lewis
Friday, July 4, 2008
deep stuff
If you are thirsty, you may drink.”
[...] For a second she stared here and there, wondering who had spoken. Then the voice said again, “If you are thirsty, come and drink,” [...] [she] realised that it was the lion speaking. [...] [T]he voice was not like a man’s. It was deeper, wilder, and stronger; a sort of heavy, golden voice. It did not make her any less frightened than she had been before, but it made her frightened in rather a different way.
“Are you not thirsty?” said the lion.
“I’m dying of thirst,” said Jill.
“Then drink,” said the lion.
“May I – could I – would you mind going away while I do?” said Jill.
The Lion answered this only by a look and a very low growl. And as Jill gazed at its motionless bulk, she realised that she might as well have asked the whole mountain to move aside for her convenience.
The delicious rippling noise of the stream was driving her nearly frantic.
“Will you promise not to – do anything to me, if I do come?” said Jill.
“I make no promise,” said the Lion.
Jill was so thirsty now that, without noticing it, she had come a step nearer.
“Do you eat girls?” she said.
“I have swallowed up girls and boys, women and men, kings and emperors, cities and realms,” said the Lion. It didn’t say this as if it were boasting, nor as if it were sorry, nor as if it were angry. It just said it.
“I daren’t come and drink,” said Jill.
“Then you will die of thirst,” said the Lion.
“Oh dear!” said Jill, coming another step nearer. “I suppose I must go and look for another stream then.”
“There is no other stream,” said the Lion.
It never occurred to Jill to disbelieve the Lion - no one who had seen his stern face could do that - and her mind suddenly made itself up. It was the worst thing she had ever had to do, but she went forward to the stream, knelt down, and began scooping up water in her hand. It was the coldest, most refreshing water she had ever tasted. You didn’t need to drink much of it, for it quenched your thirst at once.
- “The Silver Chair” by C. S. Lewis
[...] For a second she stared here and there, wondering who had spoken. Then the voice said again, “If you are thirsty, come and drink,” [...] [she] realised that it was the lion speaking. [...] [T]he voice was not like a man’s. It was deeper, wilder, and stronger; a sort of heavy, golden voice. It did not make her any less frightened than she had been before, but it made her frightened in rather a different way.
“Are you not thirsty?” said the lion.
“I’m dying of thirst,” said Jill.
“Then drink,” said the lion.
“May I – could I – would you mind going away while I do?” said Jill.
The Lion answered this only by a look and a very low growl. And as Jill gazed at its motionless bulk, she realised that she might as well have asked the whole mountain to move aside for her convenience.
The delicious rippling noise of the stream was driving her nearly frantic.
“Will you promise not to – do anything to me, if I do come?” said Jill.
“I make no promise,” said the Lion.
Jill was so thirsty now that, without noticing it, she had come a step nearer.
“Do you eat girls?” she said.
“I have swallowed up girls and boys, women and men, kings and emperors, cities and realms,” said the Lion. It didn’t say this as if it were boasting, nor as if it were sorry, nor as if it were angry. It just said it.
“I daren’t come and drink,” said Jill.
“Then you will die of thirst,” said the Lion.
“Oh dear!” said Jill, coming another step nearer. “I suppose I must go and look for another stream then.”
“There is no other stream,” said the Lion.
It never occurred to Jill to disbelieve the Lion - no one who had seen his stern face could do that - and her mind suddenly made itself up. It was the worst thing she had ever had to do, but she went forward to the stream, knelt down, and began scooping up water in her hand. It was the coldest, most refreshing water she had ever tasted. You didn’t need to drink much of it, for it quenched your thirst at once.
- “The Silver Chair” by C. S. Lewis
Sunday, June 15, 2008
CERTAIN love
CERTAIN means:
fixed, settled, dependable, reliable
known or proved to be true : indisputable
assured in mind or action
a CERTAIN love. a love that is fixed, settled, dependable, reliable, proven to be true, known to be true, indisputable. a love that is assured in mind or action--doesn't decide from day to day whether to love or not--it is consistent and unwavering. Even more dependable as the dawn breaking and the sun setting is certain love. Even stronger than a mountain that cannot be moved even by the most severe of winds is this love.
That's how God loves. The God kind of Love never fails. If it is really love, it can't be uncertain...because real love is never uncertain. Real love walks through uncertain situations without compromising itself. Real love is certain, and in that certainty, it is fierce. It is not safe. It can be soft if that is what is necessary. It can let go if that's what is best for the other person. But it never caves in. It never runs. It never breaks covenant or walks away.
fixed, settled, dependable, reliable
known or proved to be true : indisputable
assured in mind or action
a CERTAIN love. a love that is fixed, settled, dependable, reliable, proven to be true, known to be true, indisputable. a love that is assured in mind or action--doesn't decide from day to day whether to love or not--it is consistent and unwavering. Even more dependable as the dawn breaking and the sun setting is certain love. Even stronger than a mountain that cannot be moved even by the most severe of winds is this love.
That's how God loves. The God kind of Love never fails. If it is really love, it can't be uncertain...because real love is never uncertain. Real love walks through uncertain situations without compromising itself. Real love is certain, and in that certainty, it is fierce. It is not safe. It can be soft if that is what is necessary. It can let go if that's what is best for the other person. But it never caves in. It never runs. It never breaks covenant or walks away.
Friday, June 6, 2008
Starry Night
Van Gogh made that phrase famous, but instead of allowing the stars to inspire hope, he allowed his heart to get weighed down with grief. Tonight, as I looked at the night sky, I remembered back to when I was 15.5 (yes, I do count half birthdays), in Africa, where the sky is so bright with stars scattered everywhere because there is no artificial light. I've never seen so many constellations in my life! No grief was in that memory. In those stars I saw promises still to be fulfilled, dreams to still be released, adventures to still go on. More than anything, I saw the heart of a Creator who is more magnificent than I will ever know, and more deep than I could ever imagine. Never will I master the message of His heart. Never will I know Him fully....even though He fully knows me. That's the beauty of it. In His knowing me, He calls me to search Him out even more intimately. I don't know how to look at stars and not remember that I have a Father who I can trust. If He could make something as amazing as the night sky, surely He can do the same in my life and in the lives of everyone who will just allow Him to paint the picture.
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
...ten years from now?
"Ten years from now, what do you imagine your life will look like?"
That questions gets asked often enough. For some people, the answer comes easily. Father's pass on their businesses to their sons. Those sons get married, raise a family, become a strong part of their community. The daughter grows up, maybe goes to college, eventually settles down. They answer easily that their lives will probably look like the lives of the generations who lived before them. For others, there are dreams of a successful career with lots of money. For others, it's of adventure and risk-taking. For others it's academia or politics or the arts. Ten years is long enough to be uncertain, but short enough to need vision and direction, and therefore it gets asked.
I wonder if Peter ever thought about that as a fifteen year old boy. Probably his estimation was that in ten years, he would take over the fishing business and continue the tradition of being a fisherman. LIttle did he know Who would walk into his life: someone who would call him to fish, but in a very different way.
"Follow me." Those words changed the fabric of his existence. Not just once, but continually. The initial call came in that way--no prerequisites that promised safety or ease. Simply an offer to walk with the man Who issued the challenge. Peter followed immediately
Three years later, after his life has been turned upside down about 20 million different ways, with every dimension of his being unable to escape the hand of God, Jesus comes and eats breakfast with him. This is after He has been resurrected from the dead; after Peter denied him; after Peter walked in his inner circle for three years, watching Him heal the sick in body and heart. After that, I bet you listen pretty carefully to every word someone says to you.
"Peter, do you love me?"
"Yes, Lord; You know that I love You."
"Feed My sheep."
Then, Jesus outright told Peter, "Most assuredly, I say to you, when you were younger, you girded yourself and walked where you wished; but when you are old, you will stretch out your hands, and another will gird you and carry you where you do not wish. Follow me."
Follow Me.
Jesus knew that Peter was fishing again, having returned to his former career after Jesus was arrested and crucified. And He knew that the fathers before him fished, too. But that didn't stop the call. Peter had a wife, and probably a family. That didn't stop the call. That didn't make the cost any less or the challenge any safer.
I was thinking about that today. There are nations on my heart. Nations consist of people, of "sheep". Yet, ten years from now, if I decide I want to follow a comfortable path and live for the will of man, building my own kingdom, that won't stop God from asking me to follow HIm. He'll look at me with those eyes that show an immensity of love that both pursues and knows when to let go, and my heart will have to decide. Christ's vulnerability and honesty call me to be real with the call. The cost has not decreased. Peter fed the sheep. And Peter died walking out this mandate. He didn't die from old age. HIs death was crucifixion, upside down. Jesus told him outright that this would happen. Peter counted the cost, and because he loved Jesus, he chose to feed the sheep. He could have stayed on the fishing boat, selling fish. But every day he would be restless, haunted, unfufilled. Intead, he laid everything secure at the feet of God, and followed him. I don't think he regreted that decision.
That questions gets asked often enough. For some people, the answer comes easily. Father's pass on their businesses to their sons. Those sons get married, raise a family, become a strong part of their community. The daughter grows up, maybe goes to college, eventually settles down. They answer easily that their lives will probably look like the lives of the generations who lived before them. For others, there are dreams of a successful career with lots of money. For others, it's of adventure and risk-taking. For others it's academia or politics or the arts. Ten years is long enough to be uncertain, but short enough to need vision and direction, and therefore it gets asked.
I wonder if Peter ever thought about that as a fifteen year old boy. Probably his estimation was that in ten years, he would take over the fishing business and continue the tradition of being a fisherman. LIttle did he know Who would walk into his life: someone who would call him to fish, but in a very different way.
"Follow me." Those words changed the fabric of his existence. Not just once, but continually. The initial call came in that way--no prerequisites that promised safety or ease. Simply an offer to walk with the man Who issued the challenge. Peter followed immediately
Three years later, after his life has been turned upside down about 20 million different ways, with every dimension of his being unable to escape the hand of God, Jesus comes and eats breakfast with him. This is after He has been resurrected from the dead; after Peter denied him; after Peter walked in his inner circle for three years, watching Him heal the sick in body and heart. After that, I bet you listen pretty carefully to every word someone says to you.
"Peter, do you love me?"
"Yes, Lord; You know that I love You."
"Feed My sheep."
Then, Jesus outright told Peter, "Most assuredly, I say to you, when you were younger, you girded yourself and walked where you wished; but when you are old, you will stretch out your hands, and another will gird you and carry you where you do not wish. Follow me."
Follow Me.
Jesus knew that Peter was fishing again, having returned to his former career after Jesus was arrested and crucified. And He knew that the fathers before him fished, too. But that didn't stop the call. Peter had a wife, and probably a family. That didn't stop the call. That didn't make the cost any less or the challenge any safer.
I was thinking about that today. There are nations on my heart. Nations consist of people, of "sheep". Yet, ten years from now, if I decide I want to follow a comfortable path and live for the will of man, building my own kingdom, that won't stop God from asking me to follow HIm. He'll look at me with those eyes that show an immensity of love that both pursues and knows when to let go, and my heart will have to decide. Christ's vulnerability and honesty call me to be real with the call. The cost has not decreased. Peter fed the sheep. And Peter died walking out this mandate. He didn't die from old age. HIs death was crucifixion, upside down. Jesus told him outright that this would happen. Peter counted the cost, and because he loved Jesus, he chose to feed the sheep. He could have stayed on the fishing boat, selling fish. But every day he would be restless, haunted, unfufilled. Intead, he laid everything secure at the feet of God, and followed him. I don't think he regreted that decision.
Monday, May 12, 2008
"COME!!!!"
Word Dutch Sheets spoke on the CD Undiscovered by Rick Pino....
"They heard a sound in Jesus' day, but they couldn't identify the sound, they missed it. They even heard the sound of John the Baptist--they heard the voice crying out, but they couldn't get it! You must hear the sound of the Spirit. You must hear the voice of God saying, 'Come to Me!' You must hear Him. You must hear the sound of heaven drawing you. You must hear the sound of His presence. You've gotta get to that place where NOTHING matters but the VOICE, the sound....you must get there. It must drown out all else in your life, all of your cares, all of your other desires, ,all of your passions. Everything else has to be brought down to a level where the loudest thing you hear is His voice saying, 'Come, Come, Come!'"
"As you bring forth the sound of heaven, the Lord says, 'I will begin to fill the atmosphere. It will be not what you say--it will be WHO YOU ARE! You will no longer wonder what it means not to be able to minister or move because of the weighty presence....you will KNOW my weighty presence,' He says, 'You will know My glory.'"
"YOu must ask Him to come! You must create an atmosphere for His Spirit. You must give Him worth. You must value Him above your next breath. You must ask Him to come. You must cry out until the sound of heaven reaches earth. You must cry out until your voices are one with His. You must cry, you must cry, you must cry out for it!"
"Agh!!!! COME!!!!! COME!!!!! You must come to us!!!! You must come!!!! We must have You!!!!! COME, COME, COME! Spirit of God, Come, we plead!!!! Let the voice many waters be heard.....build a house for Your glory. COME, COME, COME!!! Holy Spirit, come with fire!!! FIRE, FIRE, FIRE!!!! Come with Your fire!"
"They heard a sound in Jesus' day, but they couldn't identify the sound, they missed it. They even heard the sound of John the Baptist--they heard the voice crying out, but they couldn't get it! You must hear the sound of the Spirit. You must hear the voice of God saying, 'Come to Me!' You must hear Him. You must hear the sound of heaven drawing you. You must hear the sound of His presence. You've gotta get to that place where NOTHING matters but the VOICE, the sound....you must get there. It must drown out all else in your life, all of your cares, all of your other desires, ,all of your passions. Everything else has to be brought down to a level where the loudest thing you hear is His voice saying, 'Come, Come, Come!'"
"As you bring forth the sound of heaven, the Lord says, 'I will begin to fill the atmosphere. It will be not what you say--it will be WHO YOU ARE! You will no longer wonder what it means not to be able to minister or move because of the weighty presence....you will KNOW my weighty presence,' He says, 'You will know My glory.'"
"YOu must ask Him to come! You must create an atmosphere for His Spirit. You must give Him worth. You must value Him above your next breath. You must ask Him to come. You must cry out until the sound of heaven reaches earth. You must cry out until your voices are one with His. You must cry, you must cry, you must cry out for it!"
"Agh!!!! COME!!!!! COME!!!!! You must come to us!!!! You must come!!!! We must have You!!!!! COME, COME, COME! Spirit of God, Come, we plead!!!! Let the voice many waters be heard.....build a house for Your glory. COME, COME, COME!!! Holy Spirit, come with fire!!! FIRE, FIRE, FIRE!!!! Come with Your fire!"
Adoration
Adoration
by Ian McIntosh
"There is a light that shines within me,
there is a hope that burns inside me.
Deep within my soul, my very existence,
there is a being waiting to be freed.
A child who knows no fear, pain, or rejection.
There is an emotion all encompassing of
excitement, joyfullness, gladness, and love.
The creative potential of laughter
and the undeniable power of an infants joy live inside me.
Unmeasureable are my limits for I call You FATHER.
Unimaginable my potential for You have called me son.
There is someone inside of me, waiting to be unleashed,
whom You embrace, whom I long to be.
There is an all consuming fire,
a light that permeates from my very being.
You have unlocked me, God.
The doors You open, no man can shut.
I will praise You for all my days, for You are good.
You have released me, God, with Your love.
You are EVERYTHING."
by Ian McIntosh
"There is a light that shines within me,
there is a hope that burns inside me.
Deep within my soul, my very existence,
there is a being waiting to be freed.
A child who knows no fear, pain, or rejection.
There is an emotion all encompassing of
excitement, joyfullness, gladness, and love.
The creative potential of laughter
and the undeniable power of an infants joy live inside me.
Unmeasureable are my limits for I call You FATHER.
Unimaginable my potential for You have called me son.
There is someone inside of me, waiting to be unleashed,
whom You embrace, whom I long to be.
There is an all consuming fire,
a light that permeates from my very being.
You have unlocked me, God.
The doors You open, no man can shut.
I will praise You for all my days, for You are good.
You have released me, God, with Your love.
You are EVERYTHING."
Saturday, May 10, 2008
Poverty lyrics
Lyrics:
"There's a power in poverty that breaks principalities
And brings the authorities down to their knees
There's a brewing frustration and ageless temptation
To fight for control by some manipulation
But the God of the Kingdoms and the God of the Nations
The God of creation sends this revelation
Thru the homeless and penniless Jesus the son
The poor will inherit the Kingdom to come
Where will we turn when our world falls apart,
And all of the treasures we?ve stored in our barns
Can?t buy the Kingdom of God?
Who will we praise when we?ve praised all our lives
men who build Kingdoms and men who build fame
but heaven does not know their names?
What will we fear when all that remains
Is God on His throne, with a child in his arms, and love in his eyes
And the sound of his heart cries?"
-Jason Upton (lyrics)
"There's a power in poverty that breaks principalities
And brings the authorities down to their knees
There's a brewing frustration and ageless temptation
To fight for control by some manipulation
But the God of the Kingdoms and the God of the Nations
The God of creation sends this revelation
Thru the homeless and penniless Jesus the son
The poor will inherit the Kingdom to come
Where will we turn when our world falls apart,
And all of the treasures we?ve stored in our barns
Can?t buy the Kingdom of God?
Who will we praise when we?ve praised all our lives
men who build Kingdoms and men who build fame
but heaven does not know their names?
What will we fear when all that remains
Is God on His throne, with a child in his arms, and love in his eyes
And the sound of his heart cries?"
-Jason Upton (lyrics)
Sunday, May 4, 2008
Jesus' face--It'll wreck your theology
That's pretty much all this blog is about. Yeah. I wanna come undone.
"Je t'adore mon amie"
That's french for, "Your smile will have my heart forever."
Jesus, your smile, I want it to have my heart forever.
Cause when You smile, I can't resist. No one loves me like You do, and I want to know that face of Yours--just like lovers--who know each others' faces better than anyone else.
When Jesus' smile has your heart, you can't say no. He's too beautiful, too wonderful, too majestic. Your heart gets wrecked the moment He looks at you. And then, all you want is to make Him smile for the rest of your life.
Jesus, your smile, I want it to have my heart forever.
Cause when You smile, I can't resist. No one loves me like You do, and I want to know that face of Yours--just like lovers--who know each others' faces better than anyone else.
When Jesus' smile has your heart, you can't say no. He's too beautiful, too wonderful, too majestic. Your heart gets wrecked the moment He looks at you. And then, all you want is to make Him smile for the rest of your life.
Saturday, May 3, 2008
CREATE!
create:
to bring into existence
to produce through imaginative skill
to make or bring into existence something new
God created the world out of nothing. There are still things that need to be created--things that have never before been seen, but that God is wanting to birth through His people. And not just creative miracles. What about creative ways of preaching the Gospel? What about inventions and movies and companies that exist as a prophetic message, preaching the Gospel, testifying of Jesus to the very fabric of society that needs a clear voice that isn't caught up the religious "thee" and "thou" jargon of the churched. What about undercover prophets who are invading hollywood, the FBI, the military, dignitary meetings, concert halls, college campuses, the medical field, anti-God science establishments? Cause when you walk in authority, which comes from purity of motive, people listen. They may not like you, but you'll have their ear, just like Paul had the ear of Agrippa. But different. Because it's time for the unprecedented things that come from being led as sons and daughters.
Dream big. Cause one day you'll become that dream. One day, you'll be walking along the street, just like the two guys on the road to Emmaus, who could only dream of Jesus actually being alive. All of a sudden, Jesus will start walking right next to you...you'll be walking in that dream. Or you'll be like Peter, captured in a prison, about to be martyred. All of a sudden, an angel appears...and all you can say is, "Am I in a vision?" as you walk through the gate of the city into freedom, the angel disappearing into thin air. But still, different, cause it's time for the unprecedented. It's time to get with the Creator and ask Him to use you to create things that bring the real thing into the earth.
to bring into existence
to produce through imaginative skill
to make or bring into existence something new
God created the world out of nothing. There are still things that need to be created--things that have never before been seen, but that God is wanting to birth through His people. And not just creative miracles. What about creative ways of preaching the Gospel? What about inventions and movies and companies that exist as a prophetic message, preaching the Gospel, testifying of Jesus to the very fabric of society that needs a clear voice that isn't caught up the religious "thee" and "thou" jargon of the churched. What about undercover prophets who are invading hollywood, the FBI, the military, dignitary meetings, concert halls, college campuses, the medical field, anti-God science establishments? Cause when you walk in authority, which comes from purity of motive, people listen. They may not like you, but you'll have their ear, just like Paul had the ear of Agrippa. But different. Because it's time for the unprecedented things that come from being led as sons and daughters.
Dream big. Cause one day you'll become that dream. One day, you'll be walking along the street, just like the two guys on the road to Emmaus, who could only dream of Jesus actually being alive. All of a sudden, Jesus will start walking right next to you...you'll be walking in that dream. Or you'll be like Peter, captured in a prison, about to be martyred. All of a sudden, an angel appears...and all you can say is, "Am I in a vision?" as you walk through the gate of the city into freedom, the angel disappearing into thin air. But still, different, cause it's time for the unprecedented. It's time to get with the Creator and ask Him to use you to create things that bring the real thing into the earth.
Broken Chord
Broken chord. warrior lost.
I heard the news, far away
I was young. You were younger.
I wonder if I could have said something.
Would it have changed a thing?
Can we go back?
To the yesterday...
When you were still here. Before you got away.
When innocence still had a place.
Playing in the fields
Freedom as we ran
Unhindered by the circumstances--the ones that
would come soon
Yet in childlike simplicity we didn't know
I wish that I could see you
just one last time
give you a playful punch
make fun of your awful mudpie
Now I sit here in silence
Thinking on my day
the day you could have had
but you ran away. why did you run away?
I wish...
i could have been there
in the darkness
when night came with haunting thoughts
maybe i could have helped
to shift the decrees of death over your life.
maybe i could have challenged you
to stand up and fight
pleading with you--that today, there may be someone
who needed your life.
someday we'll embrace
in that place
where the grief and the pain
no longer grip your heart
no longer numb your ability to dream, to believe
where the tears that covered your face
are finally wiped away
now only peace...
finally you have ears to hear the song--
the one He is singing over you,
the one that has always been just for you....
If only you would have learned how to dream.
If only you would have learned how to receive--
love.
I wish you learned how to be loved.
I wish you would have stayed.
Why did you run away?
I heard the news, far away
I was young. You were younger.
I wonder if I could have said something.
Would it have changed a thing?
Can we go back?
To the yesterday...
When you were still here. Before you got away.
When innocence still had a place.
Playing in the fields
Freedom as we ran
Unhindered by the circumstances--the ones that
would come soon
Yet in childlike simplicity we didn't know
I wish that I could see you
just one last time
give you a playful punch
make fun of your awful mudpie
Now I sit here in silence
Thinking on my day
the day you could have had
but you ran away. why did you run away?
I wish...
i could have been there
in the darkness
when night came with haunting thoughts
maybe i could have helped
to shift the decrees of death over your life.
maybe i could have challenged you
to stand up and fight
pleading with you--that today, there may be someone
who needed your life.
someday we'll embrace
in that place
where the grief and the pain
no longer grip your heart
no longer numb your ability to dream, to believe
where the tears that covered your face
are finally wiped away
now only peace...
finally you have ears to hear the song--
the one He is singing over you,
the one that has always been just for you....
If only you would have learned how to dream.
If only you would have learned how to receive--
love.
I wish you learned how to be loved.
I wish you would have stayed.
Why did you run away?
Thursday, May 1, 2008
Falling Slowly lyrics (Once)
Glen Hansard - Falling Slowly Lyrics
I don't know you
But I want you
All the more for that
Words fall through me
And always fool me
And I can't react
And games that never amount
To more than they're meant
Will play themselves out
Take this sinking boat and point it home
We've still got time
Raise your hopeful voice you have a choice
You've made it now
Falling slowly, eyes that know me
And I can't go back
Moods that take me and erase me
And I'm painted black
You have suffered enough
And warred with yourself
It's time that you won
Take this sinking boat and point it home
We've still got time
Raise your hopeful voice you had a choice
You've made it now
Take this sinking boat and point it home
We've still got time
Raise your hopeful voice you had a choice
You've made it now
Falling slowly sing your melody
I'll sing along
I don't know you
But I want you
All the more for that
Words fall through me
And always fool me
And I can't react
And games that never amount
To more than they're meant
Will play themselves out
Take this sinking boat and point it home
We've still got time
Raise your hopeful voice you have a choice
You've made it now
Falling slowly, eyes that know me
And I can't go back
Moods that take me and erase me
And I'm painted black
You have suffered enough
And warred with yourself
It's time that you won
Take this sinking boat and point it home
We've still got time
Raise your hopeful voice you had a choice
You've made it now
Take this sinking boat and point it home
We've still got time
Raise your hopeful voice you had a choice
You've made it now
Falling slowly sing your melody
I'll sing along
Sunday, April 27, 2008
The Lines Fall on Pleasant Places
Psalm 16
A Michtam of David.
1 Preserve me, O God, for in You I put my trust.
2 O my soul, you have said to the LORD,
“You are my Lord,
My goodness is nothing apart from You.”
3 As for the saints who are on the earth,
“They are the excellent ones, in whom is all my delight.”
4 Their sorrows shall be multiplied who hasten after another god;
Their drink offerings of blood I will not offer,
Nor take up their names on my lips.
5 O LORD, You are the portion of my inheritance and my cup;
You maintain my lot.
6 The lines have fallen to me in pleasant places;
Yes, I have a good inheritance.
7 I will bless the LORD who has given me counsel;
My heart also instructs me in the night seasons.
8 I have set the LORD always before me;
Because He is at my right hand I shall not be moved.
9 Therefore my heart is glad, and my glory rejoices;
My flesh also will rest in hope.
10 For You will not leave my soul in Sheol,
Nor will You allow Your Holy One to see corruption.
11 You will show me the path of life;
In Your presence is fullness of joy;
At Your right hand are pleasures forevermore.
A Michtam of David.
1 Preserve me, O God, for in You I put my trust.
2 O my soul, you have said to the LORD,
“You are my Lord,
My goodness is nothing apart from You.”
3 As for the saints who are on the earth,
“They are the excellent ones, in whom is all my delight.”
4 Their sorrows shall be multiplied who hasten after another god;
Their drink offerings of blood I will not offer,
Nor take up their names on my lips.
5 O LORD, You are the portion of my inheritance and my cup;
You maintain my lot.
6 The lines have fallen to me in pleasant places;
Yes, I have a good inheritance.
7 I will bless the LORD who has given me counsel;
My heart also instructs me in the night seasons.
8 I have set the LORD always before me;
Because He is at my right hand I shall not be moved.
9 Therefore my heart is glad, and my glory rejoices;
My flesh also will rest in hope.
10 For You will not leave my soul in Sheol,
Nor will You allow Your Holy One to see corruption.
11 You will show me the path of life;
In Your presence is fullness of joy;
At Your right hand are pleasures forevermore.
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Awake?
A whole pot of coffee.
A RedBull.
Chocolate covered espresso beans.
No-Doze pills.
A 40 oz. dose of Mountain Dew.
After that, you should be awake....RIGHT?!?
And yet, for some reason, we are still asleep, apathetic, and unaware of the times.
At least that's how it feels sometimes. What will it take to wake up?!?
Maybe we've heard too many lullaby sermons. Too many feel good words. Too much, "peace, peace, when there is no peace" worship. Gone to too many conferences. I'll be the first to say that I am thankful for the love of God--that the very nature of God is Love--cause I am nothing without it--a chief among sinners who desperately needs the gift Jesus gave to me. I am thankful for soaking times in His presence because I want to love on Him, hear His voice, just be with Him. But is His love soft? Or is it meant to catalyze? I think if we are really receiving His love, we wouldn't be asleep. We would be getting mobilized.
Because lovers speak. They share the most intimate things of their hearts with one another. They strategize together. They make plans for the future. They devise ways to be successful in the world. And their kisses empower one another with confidence and equip each other with weaponry. Pure love is a force to be reckoned with because it energizes you in ways you didn't know were possible. It gives you courage. It helps you tap into reservoirs of potential that you didn't know existed. Creative ideas come that shouldn't even be human because they seem so divine.
So why are we still asleep? Why are we choosing to avoid our lover, finding "better" things to do with our time? Why are we not listening to His voice? Jesus said, "Take heed, watch and pray; for you do not know when the time is....what I say to you, I way to all: Watch!" (mark 13:35-37)
Why did He tell us to watch? Because he understands battle. He knows what is necessary in order to walk victoriously--and that when we obey Him, we will always be led into victory. He knows that when we trust Him, He can gird us up like He did to Elijah--running faster than wind to beat Ahab to the gate. It's time to beat the enemy to the gate.
"So, God, awaken us...awaken me! Forgive us for complacency. Forgive us for feel good sermons that keep us passified in our seats and for idolizing ministers who we've put up on a pedestal. Forgive us for forsaking You and turning to idols of religion and the earthly strategies of man. Forgive us for mixing Your Word with the culture and not asking for the ancient paths. Give us ears to hear, eyes to see, hearts to understand, a hunger to really seek. God, we need Your Kingdom to come to earth! Align us with heaven. Invade every thought that we've had of You until we see You as You truly are. Amen."
A RedBull.
Chocolate covered espresso beans.
No-Doze pills.
A 40 oz. dose of Mountain Dew.
After that, you should be awake....RIGHT?!?
And yet, for some reason, we are still asleep, apathetic, and unaware of the times.
At least that's how it feels sometimes. What will it take to wake up?!?
Maybe we've heard too many lullaby sermons. Too many feel good words. Too much, "peace, peace, when there is no peace" worship. Gone to too many conferences. I'll be the first to say that I am thankful for the love of God--that the very nature of God is Love--cause I am nothing without it--a chief among sinners who desperately needs the gift Jesus gave to me. I am thankful for soaking times in His presence because I want to love on Him, hear His voice, just be with Him. But is His love soft? Or is it meant to catalyze? I think if we are really receiving His love, we wouldn't be asleep. We would be getting mobilized.
Because lovers speak. They share the most intimate things of their hearts with one another. They strategize together. They make plans for the future. They devise ways to be successful in the world. And their kisses empower one another with confidence and equip each other with weaponry. Pure love is a force to be reckoned with because it energizes you in ways you didn't know were possible. It gives you courage. It helps you tap into reservoirs of potential that you didn't know existed. Creative ideas come that shouldn't even be human because they seem so divine.
So why are we still asleep? Why are we choosing to avoid our lover, finding "better" things to do with our time? Why are we not listening to His voice? Jesus said, "Take heed, watch and pray; for you do not know when the time is....what I say to you, I way to all: Watch!" (mark 13:35-37)
Why did He tell us to watch? Because he understands battle. He knows what is necessary in order to walk victoriously--and that when we obey Him, we will always be led into victory. He knows that when we trust Him, He can gird us up like He did to Elijah--running faster than wind to beat Ahab to the gate. It's time to beat the enemy to the gate.
"So, God, awaken us...awaken me! Forgive us for complacency. Forgive us for feel good sermons that keep us passified in our seats and for idolizing ministers who we've put up on a pedestal. Forgive us for forsaking You and turning to idols of religion and the earthly strategies of man. Forgive us for mixing Your Word with the culture and not asking for the ancient paths. Give us ears to hear, eyes to see, hearts to understand, a hunger to really seek. God, we need Your Kingdom to come to earth! Align us with heaven. Invade every thought that we've had of You until we see You as You truly are. Amen."
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Shifting Laws and Decrees
"...preach, saying, 'The kingdom of heaven is at hand.' Heal the sick, cleanse the lepers, raise the dead, cast out demons. Freely you have received, freely give." -Matthew 10:7-8
For the kingdom of heaven to come near in someone's life, that must mean that another kingdom has been in place there. Just like the demoniac with a legion of demons who were set free, there are governments over individuals that can be unrighteous, keeping them in slavery. Maybe that's a weird concept, but I think it is true. Just like whole nations have forms of government, individuals also have their own personal governements. And with that government are laws that govern how they behave and how they perceive the world.
When I visited Russia about six years ago, I was struck by the sharp contrast between the people there and the people in the United States. I loved the people,but they rarely smiled on the streets. Most of the time all I felt was mistrust from them towards everyone they encountered. The city had a cold feel to it. In St. Petersburg, I road a subway system that was made during wartime, deep within the ground. It gave me a glimpse of the ravishes the nation had lived through, along with the despair that came as a result of Communism. The leadership that the people were under affected how they viewed life.
These analogies are giving me a new perspective on deliverance. In a way, deliverance is like shifting laws and decrees over people's lives--over my life. Where there have been unrighteous decrees made, meant to bring destruction and evil, those curses can be reversed by bringing the kingdom of heaven near. That's what healing and deliverance is anyways--it's a changing of government--a changing of rule. Just like America was freed from the governing monarchy of England in the Revolutionary war to become a democratic republic, so can people be freed from the oppression and possession of the enemy.
just some random thoughts.
Unprecedented
UNPRECEDENTED:
Without previous instance; never before known or experienced; unexampled or unparalleled, unique, extraordinary, exceptional.
An Unprecedented walk. A lifestyle that the world has yet to see. Men and women with a faith that has never been witnessed. Creative miracles that are unexampled. Salvations that are extraordinary. Stories that are unparalleled. Courage without previous instance. Love that is exceptional.
Is that prideful—to think such a walk is possible? To want it for myself? I don’t think so. Smith Wigglesworth kicked a baby because God told him to do that. The baby’s limbs grew back. That was unprecedented. Jesus Christ walked on water. That was unprecedented. Paul’s shadow healed a man. That was unprecedented, too.
And if Jesus said that we would do greater works than Him, I’m thinking He meant what He said. “Just believe.”
God is changing the face of the church, which means we need to be open to some unprecedented things. The face of the anointing is not going to look like the stereotypical, suit and tie dressed, four years of seminary trained, certified through some church denomination, kind of pastor. What if the current city drug dealer is about to encounter Jesus? What if he gets so ruined by the love of God that he becomes the biggest soul winner in the neighborhood? That could send our minds reeling. Most likely it will stir up a lot of judgmental and religious spirits—especially when he starts preaching with his tattoos showing and his secular song lyrics still stuck inside his head and the occasional cuss word slipping out because he is still learning how to get his mind renewed.
To be unprecedented is to be misunderstood. Not on purpose. That would just be stupid. But to be misunderstood because you are following the leading of the Holy Spirit seems to be a typical thing throughout church history, especially when things of the Spirit start awakening a culture. Maybe He is going to give you ideas that have not yet been thought of by human minds. The unseen is often misunderstood because it takes imagination and faith to believe that it can come into actual existence.
I guess I’m writing this because I want to be a part of whatever God’s doing—even if it is unprecedented and unfamiliar. I don’t even really know what I’m talking about, but I do know that I’ve been “churched” my whole life. Now, I just want to be real and allow God to “unchurch” me if that’s what it takes. Cliches, regurgitated truths that make people think I’m spiritual, and irrelevant speeches aren’t getting the Kingdom advanced. I want what is alive—the fresh manna that fills me and not moldy bread from yesterday that will just make me sick. I want the Holy Spirit stirrings and the Jesus Christ of Nazareth who died to bring the real thing kind of awakenings.
A good friend of mine quoted a famous rapper who once said, “Talk is cheap.” Sometimes God has a way of gently correcting us through small sayings like that. He did that to me tonight as I was thinking about the unprecedented things that He might start doing on the earth. “Just do it.” That’s what He told me—to stop talking about all of the things I want to do, while at the same time including all of my excuses, always saying that tomorrow will be the day that I take a risk and try something new. Mountains were made to be climbed...and they are ready to be climbed today. There is only so much planning that you can do. Eventually, you just have to get up and go on the expedition. If you wait too long, your chance may be lost—or if you get afraid, you may get passed by, just like a majority of the children of Israel who were afraid to go into Canaan because they didn’t know if they would be victorious. There are some mountains that have been designed specifically for me to claim—to put a flag on as a symbol of the Kingdom—to take as an inheritance. I guess in the past I would apologize for even the thought of wanting that mountain. It seemed prideful or arrogant to talk in such a way. But I don’t feel that way anymore. God is brilliant. He deserves to be glorified through His people. He is coming back for a bride who is glorious and shining forth His majesty. So if He isn’t apologizing for that desire, why should we ever apologize for wanting to possess the mountains and for wanting to walk in the unprecedented? We shouldn’t.
Let’s just do it….this unprecedented thing…whatever it looks like, sounds like, smells like, tastes like, feels like…as long as God’s smiling, we’re okay.
Friday, April 18, 2008
Wise Foolishness....
“Where is the wise person? Where is the educated person? Where is the skilled talker of this world? God has made the wisdom of the world foolish. In the wisdom of God the world did not know God through its own wisdom. So God chose to use the message that sounds foolish to save those who believe…we preach Christ crucified.”
(1 cor. 1:20-23)
Wow.
God points to the cross and says, “THIS IS WISDOM! THIS IS THE WISEST THING YOU WILL EVER SEE! This is the most brilliant and powerful act ever displayed." The world looks at a man dying on a cross, claiming to be a King who will somehow come out of the grave alive in order to save a sinful world…and says, “A man, lying on a tree, naked, humiliated and shamed? How foolish to think this is wisdom! how ridiculous to believe it could actually bring salvation. We are not even in need of a rescue.” Yet, God says, “This is wisdom. This is how I think. What the world calls wise, I call foolish. I'm not going to roll according to your box or according to the way you think about Me.”
God, I want to learn to think like You think…just like people have prayed throughout generations, please, pour out a spirit of wisdom and revelation……help me to learn just like Jesus:
"when You move, I move....just like that."
(1 cor. 1:20-23)
Wow.
God points to the cross and says, “THIS IS WISDOM! THIS IS THE WISEST THING YOU WILL EVER SEE! This is the most brilliant and powerful act ever displayed." The world looks at a man dying on a cross, claiming to be a King who will somehow come out of the grave alive in order to save a sinful world…and says, “A man, lying on a tree, naked, humiliated and shamed? How foolish to think this is wisdom! how ridiculous to believe it could actually bring salvation. We are not even in need of a rescue.” Yet, God says, “This is wisdom. This is how I think. What the world calls wise, I call foolish. I'm not going to roll according to your box or according to the way you think about Me.”
God, I want to learn to think like You think…just like people have prayed throughout generations, please, pour out a spirit of wisdom and revelation……help me to learn just like Jesus:
"when You move, I move....just like that."
Monday, April 7, 2008
I Don't Have a Title....
April 8, 2008. 2:00 a.m., Eastern Time
Freedom time
That’s what we say
Wired for Revolution—
What does that mean anyway?
Taking old clichés,
Making the words relevant for today
Passionate on Sunday
Knowing when to stand
When to clap
When to spew out the words
That I’ve been trained to say.
All those nice songs,
The ones that make me feel nice inside.
But as soon as I have a chance,
When no one is looking or listening,
That’s when compromise sets in…
But grace is there, right?
Or have I just cheapened the beauty and power of this gift
with my justifications in the dark of the night?
It’s so easy to say, “peace peace”
Especially when there is no such thing.
It’s hard to be real
To just admit it….I fall short….
What is really burning in our hearts? In mine?
Deception can come in like a smokescreen.
Where are the prophets of today—
With words that cut like fire
And eyes that burn like a sword
(I know that’s backward, but who likes normal anymore?)
The ones who have actually walked with Jesus—
Not just pretending to know His heart.
Searching for the answers to these questions
Deep ones that seem to be as voidless
As the darkness God spoke into
When will the meaning come?
When will direction penetrate this darkness?
I want to learn how to walk like Enoch.
I’m tired of misrepresentation
Fearing that people are saying things without really even know what they are saying.
Fearing that I’m doing that, too.
Big words. Little action.
And the games. That’s what I’m tired of the most.
The business deals that take place in the pulpit.
The behind the scenes exchanges that keep voices silent.
The way church seems more about title and position and someone’s own kingdom
Than a place of deliverance, freedom, resoration.
An undefiled and pure gospel replaced with comfort words—
Just like comfort foods that make us fat and sedated.
I used to think I knew what those words meant—
The ones that said something about “seek first”
Now I don’t know if I ever did
Cause it’s only now that I’m beginning to see
The price that comes with such a journey
My life for….for what?
Do I even care anymore?
Cause I sure don’t act like it’s worth the cost.
The value of a pearl has been lost to me as I’ve searched for counterfeit loves.
Yet.
Even in complacency.
I can’t help but remember
The smell
The sound
The taste
The feel
The images
Of that land
The one I used to believe in so deeply
It was worth my life.
The one that I was wrecked for once…
When I saw that its center was Love Divine.
Maybe the questions seem to be reaching into a voidless space.
But God is the Master of speaking into the void,
the total darkness,
And those words create the miracle of light.
Light penetrates darkness
Truth comes into the midst of lies
What can be shaken will be
What is crooked will be made straight.
That Kingdom is still beckoning for me to come,
To pick up my treasure hunting bag once again
To brush off the dust from the map
To shake off my frustrations and my disappointments
To get healed and spin myself out of this wrapping of offenses,
To believe that there really are others who want something that is pure and uncompromised...free from the materialism of the culture
To follow His lead and start seeking once again….
to start journeying after what is real…what is pure….what is lovely….what is truly free...
The smell.
The sound.
The taste.
The feel.
The images.
God, take me with You into a deeper revelation of these things.
Matthew 16:25: "For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it."
Freedom time
That’s what we say
Wired for Revolution—
What does that mean anyway?
Taking old clichés,
Making the words relevant for today
Passionate on Sunday
Knowing when to stand
When to clap
When to spew out the words
That I’ve been trained to say.
All those nice songs,
The ones that make me feel nice inside.
But as soon as I have a chance,
When no one is looking or listening,
That’s when compromise sets in…
But grace is there, right?
Or have I just cheapened the beauty and power of this gift
with my justifications in the dark of the night?
It’s so easy to say, “peace peace”
Especially when there is no such thing.
It’s hard to be real
To just admit it….I fall short….
What is really burning in our hearts? In mine?
Deception can come in like a smokescreen.
Where are the prophets of today—
With words that cut like fire
And eyes that burn like a sword
(I know that’s backward, but who likes normal anymore?)
The ones who have actually walked with Jesus—
Not just pretending to know His heart.
Searching for the answers to these questions
Deep ones that seem to be as voidless
As the darkness God spoke into
When will the meaning come?
When will direction penetrate this darkness?
I want to learn how to walk like Enoch.
I’m tired of misrepresentation
Fearing that people are saying things without really even know what they are saying.
Fearing that I’m doing that, too.
Big words. Little action.
And the games. That’s what I’m tired of the most.
The business deals that take place in the pulpit.
The behind the scenes exchanges that keep voices silent.
The way church seems more about title and position and someone’s own kingdom
Than a place of deliverance, freedom, resoration.
An undefiled and pure gospel replaced with comfort words—
Just like comfort foods that make us fat and sedated.
I used to think I knew what those words meant—
The ones that said something about “seek first”
Now I don’t know if I ever did
Cause it’s only now that I’m beginning to see
The price that comes with such a journey
My life for….for what?
Do I even care anymore?
Cause I sure don’t act like it’s worth the cost.
The value of a pearl has been lost to me as I’ve searched for counterfeit loves.
Yet.
Even in complacency.
I can’t help but remember
The smell
The sound
The taste
The feel
The images
Of that land
The one I used to believe in so deeply
It was worth my life.
The one that I was wrecked for once…
When I saw that its center was Love Divine.
Maybe the questions seem to be reaching into a voidless space.
But God is the Master of speaking into the void,
the total darkness,
And those words create the miracle of light.
Light penetrates darkness
Truth comes into the midst of lies
What can be shaken will be
What is crooked will be made straight.
That Kingdom is still beckoning for me to come,
To pick up my treasure hunting bag once again
To brush off the dust from the map
To shake off my frustrations and my disappointments
To get healed and spin myself out of this wrapping of offenses,
To believe that there really are others who want something that is pure and uncompromised...free from the materialism of the culture
To follow His lead and start seeking once again….
to start journeying after what is real…what is pure….what is lovely….what is truly free...
The smell.
The sound.
The taste.
The feel.
The images.
God, take me with You into a deeper revelation of these things.
Matthew 16:25: "For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it."
Sunday, March 23, 2008
Nicholas Nickleby quotes
"If our affections be tried, our affections are our consolation and comfort; and memory, however sad, is the best and purest link between this world and a better."
"Hope to the last!" said Newman, clapping him on the back. "Always hope; that's dear boy. Never leave off hoping; it don't answer. Do you mind me, Nick? it don't answer. Don't leave a stone unturned. It's always something, to know you've done the most you could. But, don't leave off hoping, or it's of no use doing anything. Hope, hope, to the last!" Charles Dickens Nicholas Nickleby
It was a harder day's journey than yesterday's, for there were long and weary hills to climb; and in journeys, as in life, it is a great deal easier to go down hill than up. However, they kept on, with unabated perseverance, and the hill has not yet lifted its face to heaven that perseverance will not gain the summit of at last.
Mystery and disappointment are not absolutely indispensable to the growth of love, but they are, very often, its powerful auxiliaries.
"Hope to the last!" said Newman, clapping him on the back. "Always hope; that's dear boy. Never leave off hoping; it don't answer. Do you mind me, Nick? it don't answer. Don't leave a stone unturned. It's always something, to know you've done the most you could. But, don't leave off hoping, or it's of no use doing anything. Hope, hope, to the last!" Charles Dickens Nicholas Nickleby
It was a harder day's journey than yesterday's, for there were long and weary hills to climb; and in journeys, as in life, it is a great deal easier to go down hill than up. However, they kept on, with unabated perseverance, and the hill has not yet lifted its face to heaven that perseverance will not gain the summit of at last.
Mystery and disappointment are not absolutely indispensable to the growth of love, but they are, very often, its powerful auxiliaries.
quote from "Provocations"
The following is from Søren Kierkegaard's "Provocations" (pg. 171).
We must awaken the collision. The possibility of offense must again be preached to life. Only the possibility of offense is able to waken those who have fallen asleep, is able to break the spell so that Christianity is itself again. Woe to him, therefore, who preaches Christianity without the possibility of offense. Woe to the person who smoothly, flirtatiously, convincingly preaches some soft, sweet something which is supposed to be Christianity! Woe to the person who betrays the mystery of faith and distorts it into public wisdom in order to take away the possibility of offense! Woe to the person who speaks of the mystery of the Atonement without detecting in it anything of the possibility of offense.
We must awaken the collision. The possibility of offense must again be preached to life. Only the possibility of offense is able to waken those who have fallen asleep, is able to break the spell so that Christianity is itself again. Woe to him, therefore, who preaches Christianity without the possibility of offense. Woe to the person who smoothly, flirtatiously, convincingly preaches some soft, sweet something which is supposed to be Christianity! Woe to the person who betrays the mystery of faith and distorts it into public wisdom in order to take away the possibility of offense! Woe to the person who speaks of the mystery of the Atonement without detecting in it anything of the possibility of offense.
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
Dear Houston
Dear Houston,
Someone once told me that when stories come to you, they need to be cared for because they can change another person's life. I have encountered many stories on my trip to this once unknown land, and as I head back to a place much more familiar (to me) than Texas, I leave with a heartache that indicates growth and change and love and heart connection. I leave with an expectation of what is to come, along with an extreme gratefulness for what has been embraced and experienced already. I pray that those stories will one day change someone else as I pass them on.
I received my acceptance letter to the University of Maryland earlier this week.(God, can Houston and Maryland please merge for just two years? that would be great...for sure!!!:-) Even as I write this in my sadness over leaving new friends who have become like family, my heart is burning for that campus, and an excitement is stirring for what God is wanting to create in the midst of a dark place. I am looking forward to the stories and the Holy Spirit meetings as He invades the streets and creates magnificence out of brokeness and hope out of despair. I"m looking forward to conversations with drunks, druggies, the religious, the intellectuals, etc. Randomness is always welcome. I don't know exactly what God wants to do or how He will do it, but I know that He is always into breaking tradition and shaking up what's normal...like entering wal-mart through the exit door and exiting through the entrance. That gets me excited. I am excited to see how He explodes in the university system across this nation in the years to come, capturing hearts and awakening a generation to their call to be a fearless army that has looked into the eyes of Courage and become undone for anything less than the Son.
I'm learning that often the Holy Spirit directs our steps based upon the things that start exciting us deep on the inside...I guess kind of like following your heart. Going to University of Maryland is exciting me deep on the inside. Being in DC for two years is exciting me deep on the inside. Being positioned accurately as an ambassador for Christ is exciting me deep on the inside. Thinking about coming back to Houston someday is exciting me too.
Which means that I know where I need to be positioned for next year. Which makes my heart a bit achy because I will miss my new friends. But who knows what two years from now holds? Or the new things that will be birthed? Or the destiny steps that will be walked? Oh...right...God knows. :-) He's amazing like that...and He doesn't even have to try...it's all natural.
So, Houston, I want you to know that I hope to return someday. (Well, I have to come back to watch the Astros...) Maybe Houston will be my "base" home--cause I'm not too good at staying still--and I don't think that restlessness will ever go away. I think God wired me to be slightly restless. There are too many lands to see and people to meet and nations to disciple. But it's good to have a home--a place of belonging where fellowship only serves to heighten the stirring of fresh revelation and a deeper walk with Christ--a place to come back to for rejuvination after going on crazy adventures to go preach the Gospel to the unreached:-)
Thank you for teaching me even more deeply what it feels like to belong--to be accepted--to be seen for who I am as a child of God. Thank you for allowing me to dream even bigger dreams--like the pure ones that only come straight from heaven. Thank you for being friends and sisters and brothers and warriors. Thank you for reminding me what it's like to laugh, even when life throws curve balls, and to love, even when it hurts because you know that the time will come when you will have to leave. Thank you for starbucks, picking me up because I don't have a car, the rodeo, the beach, IHOP (the pancake place, not the prayer one), all night prayer meetings, hugs...like the REAL kind, not the flimsy kind, basketball, fajitas, Brisket, turkey legs, Jesus conversations, corny jokes, life drama...and the hilarious dating circles (my parents never let me date when I was young! Crazy. lol), forgiveness, joy, friendship, laughter, good food, chocolate covered bananas, Taco Bell hang out times, random texting sessions (Paul, you better not stop sending me your little encouraging word texts!), promises of a funny movie marathon, road trips, encouragement, new songs, art museums (Katy!). Thank you for showing me that there really are Christians who love each other...and that the Book of Acts kind of set-up is still a possibility. Thank you for being radical. Thank you for awkward moments of getting to know someone else. Thank you for Sonic (Marco, don't laugh at my slobber!). Thank you for challenging me. And thank you for the tattoo ideas. And the hilarious jokes. And the best laugh EVER! (Steph...that's right....that's all you woman!) Oh...and thanks for almost getting Marco into jail:-) hehehe.Thank you for making me into a Rockets fan. (but I'm definitely not gonna be swayed to any of your college teams!!!) Thank you for loving me. Thank you for embracing me. Thank you for the uncomfortable moments where I got to see places of insecurity. Thank you for not being perfect!!! Thank you for missing me:-). Thank you for having a sense of humor. Thank you for loving worship and intimacy with the Father...and for loving Jason Upton as much as me. Thank you for letting me play basketball even though I'm pretty much useless on the court, even at 5'11". (But hey, Mitchel can be my defense that I really did have one good night!).
I pray that God would bless you with joy unspeakable. I pray that He would pour out a spirit of revelation like you have never known--and that you would have the wisdom of heaven to know how to live. I pray that you would become a sign and a wonder in the land, with a voice that resounds from the most broken down of neighborhoods to the richest of homes. I pray for growth and increase and an anointing to take nations. Above all, I pray that your love would increase--and that all those around you would know that you belong to a Love that is not of this world.
There is so much more I could say. Let LIFE be your choice. I miss you and love you ALL! When I come back, we'll have to share stories about the awesome ways God is moving. That will stir up faith, for sure! (Conrad, you better memorize that commission!) Go change your world--there are no limits or boundaries to what Jesus can do! I will be praying for you guys.
And, Um...EVERYONE better visit me!!!! (For Kate and Maria, there are no exceptions...if you don't come I will track you down and get you on the plane with me!) Road trip it, "y'all"! We'll have a huge bonfire and just be crazy:-) I'll set up tents in my backyard or something. We'll sing songs and build forts and then go walk around the streets like we are homeless. That would be hilarious. Love you guys! Grace and peace. (he he, Wood). You all ROCK. And that's a definite forever opinion.
Love,
Caitlin
Someone once told me that when stories come to you, they need to be cared for because they can change another person's life. I have encountered many stories on my trip to this once unknown land, and as I head back to a place much more familiar (to me) than Texas, I leave with a heartache that indicates growth and change and love and heart connection. I leave with an expectation of what is to come, along with an extreme gratefulness for what has been embraced and experienced already. I pray that those stories will one day change someone else as I pass them on.
I received my acceptance letter to the University of Maryland earlier this week.(God, can Houston and Maryland please merge for just two years? that would be great...for sure!!!:-) Even as I write this in my sadness over leaving new friends who have become like family, my heart is burning for that campus, and an excitement is stirring for what God is wanting to create in the midst of a dark place. I am looking forward to the stories and the Holy Spirit meetings as He invades the streets and creates magnificence out of brokeness and hope out of despair. I"m looking forward to conversations with drunks, druggies, the religious, the intellectuals, etc. Randomness is always welcome. I don't know exactly what God wants to do or how He will do it, but I know that He is always into breaking tradition and shaking up what's normal...like entering wal-mart through the exit door and exiting through the entrance. That gets me excited. I am excited to see how He explodes in the university system across this nation in the years to come, capturing hearts and awakening a generation to their call to be a fearless army that has looked into the eyes of Courage and become undone for anything less than the Son.
I'm learning that often the Holy Spirit directs our steps based upon the things that start exciting us deep on the inside...I guess kind of like following your heart. Going to University of Maryland is exciting me deep on the inside. Being in DC for two years is exciting me deep on the inside. Being positioned accurately as an ambassador for Christ is exciting me deep on the inside. Thinking about coming back to Houston someday is exciting me too.
Which means that I know where I need to be positioned for next year. Which makes my heart a bit achy because I will miss my new friends. But who knows what two years from now holds? Or the new things that will be birthed? Or the destiny steps that will be walked? Oh...right...God knows. :-) He's amazing like that...and He doesn't even have to try...it's all natural.
So, Houston, I want you to know that I hope to return someday. (Well, I have to come back to watch the Astros...) Maybe Houston will be my "base" home--cause I'm not too good at staying still--and I don't think that restlessness will ever go away. I think God wired me to be slightly restless. There are too many lands to see and people to meet and nations to disciple. But it's good to have a home--a place of belonging where fellowship only serves to heighten the stirring of fresh revelation and a deeper walk with Christ--a place to come back to for rejuvination after going on crazy adventures to go preach the Gospel to the unreached:-)
Thank you for teaching me even more deeply what it feels like to belong--to be accepted--to be seen for who I am as a child of God. Thank you for allowing me to dream even bigger dreams--like the pure ones that only come straight from heaven. Thank you for being friends and sisters and brothers and warriors. Thank you for reminding me what it's like to laugh, even when life throws curve balls, and to love, even when it hurts because you know that the time will come when you will have to leave. Thank you for starbucks, picking me up because I don't have a car, the rodeo, the beach, IHOP (the pancake place, not the prayer one), all night prayer meetings, hugs...like the REAL kind, not the flimsy kind, basketball, fajitas, Brisket, turkey legs, Jesus conversations, corny jokes, life drama...and the hilarious dating circles (my parents never let me date when I was young! Crazy. lol), forgiveness, joy, friendship, laughter, good food, chocolate covered bananas, Taco Bell hang out times, random texting sessions (Paul, you better not stop sending me your little encouraging word texts!), promises of a funny movie marathon, road trips, encouragement, new songs, art museums (Katy!). Thank you for showing me that there really are Christians who love each other...and that the Book of Acts kind of set-up is still a possibility. Thank you for being radical. Thank you for awkward moments of getting to know someone else. Thank you for Sonic (Marco, don't laugh at my slobber!). Thank you for challenging me. And thank you for the tattoo ideas. And the hilarious jokes. And the best laugh EVER! (Steph...that's right....that's all you woman!) Oh...and thanks for almost getting Marco into jail:-) hehehe.Thank you for making me into a Rockets fan. (but I'm definitely not gonna be swayed to any of your college teams!!!) Thank you for loving me. Thank you for embracing me. Thank you for the uncomfortable moments where I got to see places of insecurity. Thank you for not being perfect!!! Thank you for missing me:-). Thank you for having a sense of humor. Thank you for loving worship and intimacy with the Father...and for loving Jason Upton as much as me. Thank you for letting me play basketball even though I'm pretty much useless on the court, even at 5'11". (But hey, Mitchel can be my defense that I really did have one good night!).
I pray that God would bless you with joy unspeakable. I pray that He would pour out a spirit of revelation like you have never known--and that you would have the wisdom of heaven to know how to live. I pray that you would become a sign and a wonder in the land, with a voice that resounds from the most broken down of neighborhoods to the richest of homes. I pray for growth and increase and an anointing to take nations. Above all, I pray that your love would increase--and that all those around you would know that you belong to a Love that is not of this world.
There is so much more I could say. Let LIFE be your choice. I miss you and love you ALL! When I come back, we'll have to share stories about the awesome ways God is moving. That will stir up faith, for sure! (Conrad, you better memorize that commission!) Go change your world--there are no limits or boundaries to what Jesus can do! I will be praying for you guys.
And, Um...EVERYONE better visit me!!!! (For Kate and Maria, there are no exceptions...if you don't come I will track you down and get you on the plane with me!) Road trip it, "y'all"! We'll have a huge bonfire and just be crazy:-) I'll set up tents in my backyard or something. We'll sing songs and build forts and then go walk around the streets like we are homeless. That would be hilarious. Love you guys! Grace and peace. (he he, Wood). You all ROCK. And that's a definite forever opinion.
Love,
Caitlin
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Likeness Of Jesus lyrics
I want the cry of Moses
I want the ears of samuel
I want the heart of mary
Most of all
I want the likeness of Jesus
I want the prayers of Daniel
I want the voice of John
I want the walk of Enoch
Most of all
I want the likeness of Jesus
From glory to glory,
I am transformed,
Nothing between us,
The veil has been torn
I want to be holy as he is holy
I want to be righteous as
He is righteous
I want to be loving as
He is loving
Most of all i want to
Be like Jesus
-Jonathan David Helser
I want the ears of samuel
I want the heart of mary
Most of all
I want the likeness of Jesus
I want the prayers of Daniel
I want the voice of John
I want the walk of Enoch
Most of all
I want the likeness of Jesus
From glory to glory,
I am transformed,
Nothing between us,
The veil has been torn
I want to be holy as he is holy
I want to be righteous as
He is righteous
I want to be loving as
He is loving
Most of all i want to
Be like Jesus
-Jonathan David Helser
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
Psalm 126:1
I'm putting a P.S. at the beginning of my blog: Eat yogurt with a spoon that changes colors sometime. It's a lot of fun. Now...onto something possibly more serious:-)
"When the LORD brought back the captives to Zion, we were like men who dreamed." -Psalm 126:1
That is a flippin awesome verse!!!! Where at one time, their harps were hung in the willows to release a sound of mourning, there was laughter and singing once again. Ah! To live as those who dream--as those whose lives seem too good to be true--who walk in the double portion, receiving 7 fold for everything the enemy tried to steal!!!
Here is a commentary on the verse:
http://www.searchgodsword.org/com/mhc-com/view.cgi?book=ps&chapter=126
"When the LORD brought back the captives to Zion, we were like men who dreamed." -Psalm 126:1
That is a flippin awesome verse!!!! Where at one time, their harps were hung in the willows to release a sound of mourning, there was laughter and singing once again. Ah! To live as those who dream--as those whose lives seem too good to be true--who walk in the double portion, receiving 7 fold for everything the enemy tried to steal!!!
Here is a commentary on the verse:
http://www.searchgodsword.org/com/mhc-com/view.cgi?book=ps&chapter=126
Saturday, March 8, 2008
How did he do it?
I've had the privelege and honor of knowing amazing people in my lifetime. The thing about me is that I love connecting with people's hearts, and getting to know the things that stir them. sometimes it's simply to watch their eyes start glowing. There is nothing that invigorates me more than talking about the Kingdom and about Jesus and telling stories about the greatness of God. I love to strategize with my friends, and search for creative ways to reach out to the people around us. Often, I leave wanting to be more like Jesus after seeing the passion in one of my brothers or sisters.
It is amazing to me that we have a tie that brings us together far deeper than anything of this world...a tie that stems out of covenant, which can only be broken by your own personal choice. It goes beyond language, culture, denomination, background, and anything else. It's Jesus, and His blood. It's the fellowship with the same Holy Spirit, despite what language you speak. It's being adopted as a son and daughter by Father and being a part of a radical seeded Kingdom. This unity came about through the highest price being paid--the blood of the King of heaven--of royalty that dwelt among humanity to become for them a lamb that could be slain for the salvation of the world. A lion never wants to take the form of a lamb. Yet, Jesus did. For love.
I have found it true that when you love much, you also hurt much. Not in a bad, heartbroken, depressed way--but in a way that knows when you have to leave the people you appreciate, that you will miss them and their company. Actually, sometimes that does cause your heart to feel "broken" for a time, because you've had the privelege of sharing with another's heart for a season.
It makes me wonder about Jesus. I know He was strong and brave, but if Paul felt that intense love for the saints, Jesus must have felt it even more intensely. Especially since Paul said in Phil. 1 that, "God beareth me record how greatly I long after you all from the very heart root in Iesus Christ." Wow--the very heart root of Jesus was what Paul compared the emotions and love of his heart to. In John 17, Jesus prayed for his disciples, "that the world may know that thou hast sent me, and hast beloved them, as thou hast loved me." The Father "beloved" them, and Jesus must have felt that affection, since He was so in synch with the heart of heaven. That's powerful.
Yet, Jesus' love compelled him to leave, and not to stay. That's hard. His time with His best friends, Peter, James, and John, must have been sweet. So many memories were a part of their journey, which was intensely intimate over the span of three years. John got to lean on His chest. Peter got to learn from Him about second chances. James learned who the greatest servant was. And even in the midst of the lessons, they remained friends, and grew even closer.
FOr the first time, I am wondering if that added to the agony of the cross--the heartache in Gethsemane as Jesus prayed to the Father to take the cup. I know the knowledge of the pain would have been enough for me to cry out, yet I still wonder if the affection He had for His disciples ever made Him long to stay in community, spending precious nights talking about the Kingdom of God and challenging them to be disciples of love. I know I would miss that. I do miss that when I feel the Holy Spirit calling me to a new place.
The thing about Jesus' prayer in John 17 that strikes me the most is the feeling I get of reckless abandonment in His words. His heart is surrendered to the will of the Father, and the Father's will supersedes even a longing to be with His disciples. He cries out to the Father for unity. For love. He turned His eyes to heaven at the very start of the prayer and said, "Father, the hour is come; glorify thy Son, that thy Son also may glorify thee". He was after the glory of the Father. And He set the example, as the Teacher, for His disciples to be after the same...no matter what it would cost.
That makes me want to cry in appreciation. Jesus gave up everything at the cross--and it was because of love. And Paul had this same heart beatng in him, and so his life became a drink offering--and it was because of love.
Sometimes I wish that I wasn't in the process of learning to hear the voice and quickening of the Holy Spirit. But all of my reasons are selfish, like not wanting to take the responsibility and duty of what I hear Him say to my heart as I still myself and listen. God wants to be glorified through His saints. And sometimes that glory means leaving a community that you love to go to an unknown land. That unknown land doesn't necessarily mean some foreign nation. It could be moving across to a different part of the city that really needs to hear about Jesus. I guess that would be nice because you could still be close to friends:-) (Which I know God loves!)
I just want to know how Paul did it--how he moved on from a church he loved to go to nations that did not know the truth or have a foundation laid. How did his heart handle the intensity of that separation? To me, that is reckless abandonment to the extreme--and a radical trust in God, that He will be everything that you need for every season He calls you to walk through and everey place He sends your feet to tread. Sometimes I think it would just be easier to only connect with the people who I know I will be around for a longer period of time--because then it would be less likely I would leave them as often. HOwever, that thought doesn't stick around for long because I can't imagine missing out on all of the other amazing friendships as the Lord networks His children. I am convinced that He is building an army--and we don't even understand why he brings about certain connections. But He does. And it's for His Kingdom and so the Father will be glorified. So even if I have to go on an expedition like Paul, or get sentenced to the Island of Patmos like John, I want to keep loving with everything inside of me. That's how Jesus loved. I want to be like Him. Since I know I can't do it on my own, I am praying that the Lord would teach me to love--and I am thanking HIm that the love of God has been shed abroad in my heart by the Holy Spirit. What an incredible thought! What an amazing God.
So...how did he do it? I probably still dont' know, but I have a few ideas. Reckless abandonment was the fruit of His love for the Father, and the Father had His full attention--as number one in His list of loves. Above all, He had to obey HIm, because when you love, you obey. I think that's how He could do the things He did.
It is amazing to me that we have a tie that brings us together far deeper than anything of this world...a tie that stems out of covenant, which can only be broken by your own personal choice. It goes beyond language, culture, denomination, background, and anything else. It's Jesus, and His blood. It's the fellowship with the same Holy Spirit, despite what language you speak. It's being adopted as a son and daughter by Father and being a part of a radical seeded Kingdom. This unity came about through the highest price being paid--the blood of the King of heaven--of royalty that dwelt among humanity to become for them a lamb that could be slain for the salvation of the world. A lion never wants to take the form of a lamb. Yet, Jesus did. For love.
I have found it true that when you love much, you also hurt much. Not in a bad, heartbroken, depressed way--but in a way that knows when you have to leave the people you appreciate, that you will miss them and their company. Actually, sometimes that does cause your heart to feel "broken" for a time, because you've had the privelege of sharing with another's heart for a season.
It makes me wonder about Jesus. I know He was strong and brave, but if Paul felt that intense love for the saints, Jesus must have felt it even more intensely. Especially since Paul said in Phil. 1 that, "God beareth me record how greatly I long after you all from the very heart root in Iesus Christ." Wow--the very heart root of Jesus was what Paul compared the emotions and love of his heart to. In John 17, Jesus prayed for his disciples, "that the world may know that thou hast sent me, and hast beloved them, as thou hast loved me." The Father "beloved" them, and Jesus must have felt that affection, since He was so in synch with the heart of heaven. That's powerful.
Yet, Jesus' love compelled him to leave, and not to stay. That's hard. His time with His best friends, Peter, James, and John, must have been sweet. So many memories were a part of their journey, which was intensely intimate over the span of three years. John got to lean on His chest. Peter got to learn from Him about second chances. James learned who the greatest servant was. And even in the midst of the lessons, they remained friends, and grew even closer.
FOr the first time, I am wondering if that added to the agony of the cross--the heartache in Gethsemane as Jesus prayed to the Father to take the cup. I know the knowledge of the pain would have been enough for me to cry out, yet I still wonder if the affection He had for His disciples ever made Him long to stay in community, spending precious nights talking about the Kingdom of God and challenging them to be disciples of love. I know I would miss that. I do miss that when I feel the Holy Spirit calling me to a new place.
The thing about Jesus' prayer in John 17 that strikes me the most is the feeling I get of reckless abandonment in His words. His heart is surrendered to the will of the Father, and the Father's will supersedes even a longing to be with His disciples. He cries out to the Father for unity. For love. He turned His eyes to heaven at the very start of the prayer and said, "Father, the hour is come; glorify thy Son, that thy Son also may glorify thee". He was after the glory of the Father. And He set the example, as the Teacher, for His disciples to be after the same...no matter what it would cost.
That makes me want to cry in appreciation. Jesus gave up everything at the cross--and it was because of love. And Paul had this same heart beatng in him, and so his life became a drink offering--and it was because of love.
Sometimes I wish that I wasn't in the process of learning to hear the voice and quickening of the Holy Spirit. But all of my reasons are selfish, like not wanting to take the responsibility and duty of what I hear Him say to my heart as I still myself and listen. God wants to be glorified through His saints. And sometimes that glory means leaving a community that you love to go to an unknown land. That unknown land doesn't necessarily mean some foreign nation. It could be moving across to a different part of the city that really needs to hear about Jesus. I guess that would be nice because you could still be close to friends:-) (Which I know God loves!)
I just want to know how Paul did it--how he moved on from a church he loved to go to nations that did not know the truth or have a foundation laid. How did his heart handle the intensity of that separation? To me, that is reckless abandonment to the extreme--and a radical trust in God, that He will be everything that you need for every season He calls you to walk through and everey place He sends your feet to tread. Sometimes I think it would just be easier to only connect with the people who I know I will be around for a longer period of time--because then it would be less likely I would leave them as often. HOwever, that thought doesn't stick around for long because I can't imagine missing out on all of the other amazing friendships as the Lord networks His children. I am convinced that He is building an army--and we don't even understand why he brings about certain connections. But He does. And it's for His Kingdom and so the Father will be glorified. So even if I have to go on an expedition like Paul, or get sentenced to the Island of Patmos like John, I want to keep loving with everything inside of me. That's how Jesus loved. I want to be like Him. Since I know I can't do it on my own, I am praying that the Lord would teach me to love--and I am thanking HIm that the love of God has been shed abroad in my heart by the Holy Spirit. What an incredible thought! What an amazing God.
So...how did he do it? I probably still dont' know, but I have a few ideas. Reckless abandonment was the fruit of His love for the Father, and the Father had His full attention--as number one in His list of loves. Above all, He had to obey HIm, because when you love, you obey. I think that's how He could do the things He did.
Friday, March 7, 2008
Claustrophobia
My siblings and I have played some intense games of hide-and-seek over the years. All of us can get pretty competitive, as well as stubborn, which causes occassional ruthlessnes to arise in our desire to win. Once, in an indoor game, I hid in an empty wooden trunk that was used to hold towels and blankets. It was small, but big enough for me to fit inside. I thought it would be the perfect hiding place that my sister would never find.
I was wrong. My sister found me. Instead of opening the trunk and saying, "Tag! You're the one who has to count now," she sat on the lid. She probably sat there for 30 seconds max, but those 30 seconds felt like an eternity. Never again will I hide in a trunk during hide-and-seek. I learned that day just how awful it feels to be trapped and to know you are unable to escape. Claustrophobia is not a pleasant experience.
I wonder how many people come into church and feel claustrophobic. Sometimes I do. Not because I don't love good preaching and good worship services or prayer meetings. In fact, I need them, as long as the atmosphere is free. It's just that I have a hard time accepting a Christianity that stays within four walls, with closed doors and shut windows making me feel congested. Even if there are amazing things breaking out inside those walls, those amazing things are the movements of the Holy Spirit and come from Him. I can't imagine Him wanting those explosions to remain inside, just like I couldn't imagine an artist or a musician wanting to never be admired for their work. In fact, I wonder if the Holy Spirit gets claustrophobic, wondering when we will stop trying to impress one another with how much we know about Him, even though a lot of the time everyone pretty much knows the same stuff but just shares it differently. Then it just turns into a big competition, and the truth is no longer about advancing the Kingdom, but instead about building your own great name. And by that point, is the once pure truth still pure truth? Or does it become twisted through pride?
I wonder if His heart is longing to infuse the streets with the truth that is being competed over. Actually, I don't really wonder that. I'm sure that is the longing of His heart. Because movers and shakers never want to stay where things are already getting shaken. They want to go to the places where there needs to be some new movement and shaking. And the Holy Spirit likes to shake things up:-)
Just some thoughts that are challenging me personally to not get stuck in a box.
I was wrong. My sister found me. Instead of opening the trunk and saying, "Tag! You're the one who has to count now," she sat on the lid. She probably sat there for 30 seconds max, but those 30 seconds felt like an eternity. Never again will I hide in a trunk during hide-and-seek. I learned that day just how awful it feels to be trapped and to know you are unable to escape. Claustrophobia is not a pleasant experience.
I wonder how many people come into church and feel claustrophobic. Sometimes I do. Not because I don't love good preaching and good worship services or prayer meetings. In fact, I need them, as long as the atmosphere is free. It's just that I have a hard time accepting a Christianity that stays within four walls, with closed doors and shut windows making me feel congested. Even if there are amazing things breaking out inside those walls, those amazing things are the movements of the Holy Spirit and come from Him. I can't imagine Him wanting those explosions to remain inside, just like I couldn't imagine an artist or a musician wanting to never be admired for their work. In fact, I wonder if the Holy Spirit gets claustrophobic, wondering when we will stop trying to impress one another with how much we know about Him, even though a lot of the time everyone pretty much knows the same stuff but just shares it differently. Then it just turns into a big competition, and the truth is no longer about advancing the Kingdom, but instead about building your own great name. And by that point, is the once pure truth still pure truth? Or does it become twisted through pride?
I wonder if His heart is longing to infuse the streets with the truth that is being competed over. Actually, I don't really wonder that. I'm sure that is the longing of His heart. Because movers and shakers never want to stay where things are already getting shaken. They want to go to the places where there needs to be some new movement and shaking. And the Holy Spirit likes to shake things up:-)
Just some thoughts that are challenging me personally to not get stuck in a box.
Wednesday, March 5, 2008
The Vision
Words of the Vision, written by Pete Greig,
http://www.24-7prayer.com/cm/resources/28
Check it out: http://www.jesusculture.org/media/index.php?type=3&id=47&foreign_id=47&media_id=66
The Vision
"So this guy comes up to me and says "what's the vision? What's the big idea?" I open my mouth and words come out like this…
The vision?
The vision is JESUS – obsessively, dangerously, undeniably Jesus.
The vision is an army of young people.
You see bones? I see an army. And they are FREE from materialism.
They laugh at 9-5 little prisons.
They could eat caviar on Monday and crusts on Tuesday.
They wouldn't even notice.
They know the meaning of the Matrix, the way the west was won.
They are mobile like the wind, they belong to the nations. They need no passport.. People write their addresses in pencil and wonder at their strange existence.
They are free yet they are slaves of the hurting and dirty and dying.
What is the vision ?
The vision is holiness that hurts the eyes. It makes children laugh and adults angry. It gave up the game of minimum integrity long ago to reach for the stars. It scorns the good and strains for the best. It is dangerously pure.
Light flickers from every secret motive, every private conversation.
It loves people away from their suicide leaps, their Satan games.
This is an army that will lay down its life for the cause.
A million times a day its soldiers
choose to loose
that they might one day win
the great 'Well done' of faithful sons and daughters.
Such heroes are as radical on Monday morning as Sunday night. They don't need fame from names. Instead they grin quietly upwards and hear the crowds chanting again and again: "COME ON!"
And this is the sound of the underground
The whisper of history in the making
Foundations shaking
Revolutionaries dreaming once again
Mystery is scheming in whispers
Conspiracy is breathing…
This is the sound of the underground
And the army is discipl(in)ed.
Young people who beat their bodies into submission.
Every soldier would take a bullet for his comrade at arms.
The tattoo on their back boasts "for me to live is Christ and to die is gain".
Sacrifice fuels the fire of victory in their upward eyes. Winners. Martyrs. Who can stop them ?
Can hormones hold them back?
Can failure succeed? Can fear scare them or death kill them ?
And the generation prays
like a dying man
with groans beyond talking,
with warrior cries, sulphuric tears and
with great barrow loads of laughter!
Waiting. Watching: 24 – 7 – 365.
Whatever it takes they will give: Breaking the rules. Shaking mediocrity from its cosy little hide. Laying down their rights and their precious little wrongs, laughing at labels, fasting essentials. The advertisers cannot mould them. Hollywood cannot hold them. Peer-pressure is powerless to shake their resolve at late night parties before the cockerel cries.
They are incredibly cool, dangerously attractive
inside.
On the outside? They hardly care. They wear clothes like costumes to communicate and celebrate but never to hide.
Would they surrender their image or their popularity?
They would lay down their very lives - swap seats with the man on death row - guilty as hell. A throne for an electric chair.
With blood and sweat and many tears, with sleepless nights and fruitless days,
they pray as if it all depends on God and live as if it all depends on them.
Their DNA chooses JESUS. (He breathes out, they breathe in.)
Their subconscious sings. They had a blood transfusion with Jesus.
Their words make demons scream in shopping centres.
Don't you hear them coming?
Herald the weirdo's! Summon the losers and the freaks. Here come the frightened and forgotten with fire in their eyes. They walk tall and trees applaud, skyscrapers bow, mountains are dwarfed by these children of another dimension. Their prayers summon the hounds of heaven and invoke the ancient dream of Eden.
And this vision will be. It will come to pass; it will come easily; it will come soon.
How do I know? Because this is the longing of creation itself, the groaning of the Spirit, the very dream of God. My tomorrow is his today. My distant hope is his 3D. And my feeble, whispered, faithless prayer invokes a thunderous, resounding, bone-shaking great 'Amen!' from countless angels, from hero's of the faith, from Christ himself. And he is the original dreamer, the ultimate winner.
Guaranteed."
http://www.24-7prayer.com/cm/resources/28
Check it out: http://www.jesusculture.org/media/index.php?type=3&id=47&foreign_id=47&media_id=66
The Vision
"So this guy comes up to me and says "what's the vision? What's the big idea?" I open my mouth and words come out like this…
The vision?
The vision is JESUS – obsessively, dangerously, undeniably Jesus.
The vision is an army of young people.
You see bones? I see an army. And they are FREE from materialism.
They laugh at 9-5 little prisons.
They could eat caviar on Monday and crusts on Tuesday.
They wouldn't even notice.
They know the meaning of the Matrix, the way the west was won.
They are mobile like the wind, they belong to the nations. They need no passport.. People write their addresses in pencil and wonder at their strange existence.
They are free yet they are slaves of the hurting and dirty and dying.
What is the vision ?
The vision is holiness that hurts the eyes. It makes children laugh and adults angry. It gave up the game of minimum integrity long ago to reach for the stars. It scorns the good and strains for the best. It is dangerously pure.
Light flickers from every secret motive, every private conversation.
It loves people away from their suicide leaps, their Satan games.
This is an army that will lay down its life for the cause.
A million times a day its soldiers
choose to loose
that they might one day win
the great 'Well done' of faithful sons and daughters.
Such heroes are as radical on Monday morning as Sunday night. They don't need fame from names. Instead they grin quietly upwards and hear the crowds chanting again and again: "COME ON!"
And this is the sound of the underground
The whisper of history in the making
Foundations shaking
Revolutionaries dreaming once again
Mystery is scheming in whispers
Conspiracy is breathing…
This is the sound of the underground
And the army is discipl(in)ed.
Young people who beat their bodies into submission.
Every soldier would take a bullet for his comrade at arms.
The tattoo on their back boasts "for me to live is Christ and to die is gain".
Sacrifice fuels the fire of victory in their upward eyes. Winners. Martyrs. Who can stop them ?
Can hormones hold them back?
Can failure succeed? Can fear scare them or death kill them ?
And the generation prays
like a dying man
with groans beyond talking,
with warrior cries, sulphuric tears and
with great barrow loads of laughter!
Waiting. Watching: 24 – 7 – 365.
Whatever it takes they will give: Breaking the rules. Shaking mediocrity from its cosy little hide. Laying down their rights and their precious little wrongs, laughing at labels, fasting essentials. The advertisers cannot mould them. Hollywood cannot hold them. Peer-pressure is powerless to shake their resolve at late night parties before the cockerel cries.
They are incredibly cool, dangerously attractive
inside.
On the outside? They hardly care. They wear clothes like costumes to communicate and celebrate but never to hide.
Would they surrender their image or their popularity?
They would lay down their very lives - swap seats with the man on death row - guilty as hell. A throne for an electric chair.
With blood and sweat and many tears, with sleepless nights and fruitless days,
they pray as if it all depends on God and live as if it all depends on them.
Their DNA chooses JESUS. (He breathes out, they breathe in.)
Their subconscious sings. They had a blood transfusion with Jesus.
Their words make demons scream in shopping centres.
Don't you hear them coming?
Herald the weirdo's! Summon the losers and the freaks. Here come the frightened and forgotten with fire in their eyes. They walk tall and trees applaud, skyscrapers bow, mountains are dwarfed by these children of another dimension. Their prayers summon the hounds of heaven and invoke the ancient dream of Eden.
And this vision will be. It will come to pass; it will come easily; it will come soon.
How do I know? Because this is the longing of creation itself, the groaning of the Spirit, the very dream of God. My tomorrow is his today. My distant hope is his 3D. And my feeble, whispered, faithless prayer invokes a thunderous, resounding, bone-shaking great 'Amen!' from countless angels, from hero's of the faith, from Christ himself. And he is the original dreamer, the ultimate winner.
Guaranteed."
Becoming Prophetic Fulfillment
These are INCREDIBLE times to be alive.
For years, even centuries, there have been prophets who have spoken about these times that we are living in. Joel prophesied about the pouring out of the Holy Spirit on ALL flesh. He prophesied about dreams and visions being birthed. We've tasted portions of it throughout the ages, with pockets of revivals being birthed across nations, keeping the Kingdom moving forward. Yet, I think any church historian will be able to say that never has there been a time like this. It's like we've been on a roadtrip. We've had a map and known the destination. We've had pictures to give us a taste of what we were about to see, creating a longing in our hearts, and a determination to get there. Yet, now it's like we are finally walking into the place we knew we were headed towards. THE FULFILLMENT OF PROPHECY. An army that isn't afraid of anyone but the King. Our lives are becoming the very words that were uttered years ago from mouths of those who spoke from the heart of heaven this very movement into existence. "His words framed the world." Just like Abraham, they never saw the promise, yet they had faith to contend for it for the generations that would follow them. What a privelege to be alive RIGHT NOW. To be the harvesters of the field that has been plowed in prayer and tears for years.
How thankful I am for the mothers and fathers who didn't give up--who pressed into the heart of God and kept the Word stirred up in the earth. How thankful I am for the Holy Spirit awakening a generation. So rejoice! You are strong! You are a part of this thing...this army of warriors who are called to fight for Him. Not fighting for the leaders of the faith because they could mess up, no matter how much they've done. And not fighting out of mere emotion. If that's what you are living off of, with the next conference your hope for staying stirred up, you need to encounter Jesus. Cause this thing is real, and it's a fire that carries even when everything seems hard. So let's do this! Let's be the prayer on the earth. Let's be the word from heaven.
Amen.
For years, even centuries, there have been prophets who have spoken about these times that we are living in. Joel prophesied about the pouring out of the Holy Spirit on ALL flesh. He prophesied about dreams and visions being birthed. We've tasted portions of it throughout the ages, with pockets of revivals being birthed across nations, keeping the Kingdom moving forward. Yet, I think any church historian will be able to say that never has there been a time like this. It's like we've been on a roadtrip. We've had a map and known the destination. We've had pictures to give us a taste of what we were about to see, creating a longing in our hearts, and a determination to get there. Yet, now it's like we are finally walking into the place we knew we were headed towards. THE FULFILLMENT OF PROPHECY. An army that isn't afraid of anyone but the King. Our lives are becoming the very words that were uttered years ago from mouths of those who spoke from the heart of heaven this very movement into existence. "His words framed the world." Just like Abraham, they never saw the promise, yet they had faith to contend for it for the generations that would follow them. What a privelege to be alive RIGHT NOW. To be the harvesters of the field that has been plowed in prayer and tears for years.
How thankful I am for the mothers and fathers who didn't give up--who pressed into the heart of God and kept the Word stirred up in the earth. How thankful I am for the Holy Spirit awakening a generation. So rejoice! You are strong! You are a part of this thing...this army of warriors who are called to fight for Him. Not fighting for the leaders of the faith because they could mess up, no matter how much they've done. And not fighting out of mere emotion. If that's what you are living off of, with the next conference your hope for staying stirred up, you need to encounter Jesus. Cause this thing is real, and it's a fire that carries even when everything seems hard. So let's do this! Let's be the prayer on the earth. Let's be the word from heaven.
Amen.
God Brokenness Yields Increase
Jim Braddock in Cinderella Man
William Wallace in Braveheart
The Basher Brother in Mighty Duck
Vince Papale in Invincible
And...I know there are a lot more.
I was thinking of examples of "warrior" types who made comebacks. They were away for a while, but came back better than ever. I don't really think it's so much their talent that developed. I think it's their heart--their passion--their determination. They come back on the field no longer just a soldier or a boxer or whatever else. They come back with something fueling their very heart and focusing their eyesight on something bigger.
I hope God brings some warriors back on the field right now--soldiers who may have been in obscurity for years, but God has been doing a deep work in their heart. I pray that truly broken men would speak from pulpits and lead prayer meetings and evangelistic outreaches. Because for some reason, that hidden season gives them an even greater resolve to finish the race --with One person's glory in mind and only the treasures of heaven as what they want to gain. They haven't been broken into incapable and washed up preachers. They have become wrecked with the reality of who Christ is--a reality that reaches into their heart and pulls out the person God has called them to be to shift things in this season. "It's not by might, nor by power, but by the Spirit," declares the Lord.
William Wallace in Braveheart
The Basher Brother in Mighty Duck
Vince Papale in Invincible
And...I know there are a lot more.
I was thinking of examples of "warrior" types who made comebacks. They were away for a while, but came back better than ever. I don't really think it's so much their talent that developed. I think it's their heart--their passion--their determination. They come back on the field no longer just a soldier or a boxer or whatever else. They come back with something fueling their very heart and focusing their eyesight on something bigger.
I hope God brings some warriors back on the field right now--soldiers who may have been in obscurity for years, but God has been doing a deep work in their heart. I pray that truly broken men would speak from pulpits and lead prayer meetings and evangelistic outreaches. Because for some reason, that hidden season gives them an even greater resolve to finish the race --with One person's glory in mind and only the treasures of heaven as what they want to gain. They haven't been broken into incapable and washed up preachers. They have become wrecked with the reality of who Christ is--a reality that reaches into their heart and pulls out the person God has called them to be to shift things in this season. "It's not by might, nor by power, but by the Spirit," declares the Lord.
Sunday, March 2, 2008
Don't Let This Happen Again
"On the heels of hostilities with Imperial Japan in 1942, President Franklin Delano Roosevelt issued Executive Order No. 9066 which gave the Secretary of War the power to remove any citizens or aliens from designated areas of the country. Roosevelt hoped this order would minimize sabotage, espionage, and fifth-column activity. By some estimates, the order led to 100,000 people of Japanese ancestry being placed in internment camps or in relocation centers until the end of the war in 1945. Most were displaced from the states of Washington, Oregon, California, and Arizona. While there were also significant numbers of Italian and German citizens and aliens affected, the Japanese community in the western United States (U.S.) bore the brunt of the policy.
As we now know, Executive Order No. 9066 was devastating for many Japanese families. Tragically, Christians did not reach out to the Japanese-American community during this trying time. While history records that members of the Catholic Maryknoll order voiced opposition to the policy, the Protestant and evangelical community was largely silent. There is no doubt that the immediate dislocation of hundreds of Japanese families created tremendous opportunities to live out the gospel in word and deed. Lamentably, for the most part, those opportunities were squandered.
There is a well-known story that General Douglas MacArthur asked for a number of missionaries to go to Japan during the time of its reconstruction.1 With the defeat of their forces, MacArthur saw an opportunity to introduce the gospel. The call went mostly unheeded, as only 95 Protestant missionaries were sent to Japan. Apparently, General MacArthur was not aware of American indifference to the plight of the Japanese. The church had not shown any concern for its Japanese neighbors. Was there any reason to expect that the church would reach out to Japanese people across the Pacific?
Today, the number of Christians among the Japanese-in this country and abroad-remains stubbornly small. Caught in an ethnic culture resistant to Christianity, 97 percent of all Japanese and Japanese-Americans remain unevangelized. The gospel is just too Western for many."
by Rudolph D. Gonzalez, Ph.D.
http://www.4truth.net/site/c.hiKXLbPNLrF/b.2904173/k.236E/Concerning_the_Muslims_Among_Us.htm
As we now know, Executive Order No. 9066 was devastating for many Japanese families. Tragically, Christians did not reach out to the Japanese-American community during this trying time. While history records that members of the Catholic Maryknoll order voiced opposition to the policy, the Protestant and evangelical community was largely silent. There is no doubt that the immediate dislocation of hundreds of Japanese families created tremendous opportunities to live out the gospel in word and deed. Lamentably, for the most part, those opportunities were squandered.
There is a well-known story that General Douglas MacArthur asked for a number of missionaries to go to Japan during the time of its reconstruction.1 With the defeat of their forces, MacArthur saw an opportunity to introduce the gospel. The call went mostly unheeded, as only 95 Protestant missionaries were sent to Japan. Apparently, General MacArthur was not aware of American indifference to the plight of the Japanese. The church had not shown any concern for its Japanese neighbors. Was there any reason to expect that the church would reach out to Japanese people across the Pacific?
Today, the number of Christians among the Japanese-in this country and abroad-remains stubbornly small. Caught in an ethnic culture resistant to Christianity, 97 percent of all Japanese and Japanese-Americans remain unevangelized. The gospel is just too Western for many."
by Rudolph D. Gonzalez, Ph.D.
http://www.4truth.net/site/c.hiKXLbPNLrF/b.2904173/k.236E/Concerning_the_Muslims_Among_Us.htm
Friday, February 29, 2008
Commissioning
Prophesy to the breath. (Ezekiel 37)
“God will not relent…
But how far can He go without the intercession of a generation?”
-Hannah Sheets
“He is going to have to have the most committed army of warriors the world has ever seen. Some of us may have to die for this cause. So be it. If we are going to see the great awakening that we want to see, it’s going to require everything.”
-Dutch Sheets
William Booth’s Commissioning to the Warriors of the Salvation Army:
“You must do it. You cannot hold back. You have enjoyed yourself in pleasant Christianity long enough. You’ve had your pleasant feelings, pleasant songs, pleasant meetings, and pleasant prospects. There has been much human happiness, much clapping of hands, and shouting of praises. Very much heaven on earth. But now, then, go to God and tell Him you are prepared as much as necessary to turn your back upon it all. And that you are willing as much as necessary to spend your days struggling in the midst of the perishing multitudes, whatever it may cost you. You must do it—with the light that is now broken in upon your mind, and the call now sounding in your ears, and the beckoning hands that are now before your eyes, you have no alternative. To go down among the perishing crowds is your duty. Your happiness from now on will consist in sharing in their misery, your ease in sharing their pain, your crown in helping them to bear their cross, and your heaven in going into the very jaws of hell to rescue them. Now what will you do?”
“God will not relent…
But how far can He go without the intercession of a generation?”
-Hannah Sheets
“He is going to have to have the most committed army of warriors the world has ever seen. Some of us may have to die for this cause. So be it. If we are going to see the great awakening that we want to see, it’s going to require everything.”
-Dutch Sheets
William Booth’s Commissioning to the Warriors of the Salvation Army:
“You must do it. You cannot hold back. You have enjoyed yourself in pleasant Christianity long enough. You’ve had your pleasant feelings, pleasant songs, pleasant meetings, and pleasant prospects. There has been much human happiness, much clapping of hands, and shouting of praises. Very much heaven on earth. But now, then, go to God and tell Him you are prepared as much as necessary to turn your back upon it all. And that you are willing as much as necessary to spend your days struggling in the midst of the perishing multitudes, whatever it may cost you. You must do it—with the light that is now broken in upon your mind, and the call now sounding in your ears, and the beckoning hands that are now before your eyes, you have no alternative. To go down among the perishing crowds is your duty. Your happiness from now on will consist in sharing in their misery, your ease in sharing their pain, your crown in helping them to bear their cross, and your heaven in going into the very jaws of hell to rescue them. Now what will you do?”
Thursday, February 28, 2008
It's no Sacrifice
That field didn’t grow overnight. That garden didn’t bloom in a second. That tree took years to grow. History can change in one moment—but only after several moments that built up to that one. That diamond was forged under extreme pressure to become a treasure. That building’s most important aspect is its foundation—and without it, the strongest of structures would crumble in a short time.
21 years old. Someday I will understand. Someday, looking back on these trials and on this path God has taken me on, it will make sense. At the moment though, so many things are uncertain. So many of the puzzle pieces just don’t fit together in my mind—and it tempts me to cave into disappointment and to harden my heart from believing for the best and the most excellent way. I wonder about that—about this longing—about how easy it is for me to take my hands and try to make something happen—to reason with my own understanding instead of trusting the Creator who made me for His glory.
Yet in the uncertainty, I know that God is working. That’s not a lame attempt at trying to sound strong or spiritual. I really believe that because I’ve seen its truth throughout my life. It’s a conviction that I would die for—knowing that God is I AM and that I am the apple of His eye. He keeps the word He promises to me. He holds my life in His hands. His eyes watch my path and He guards me jealously as a shield about me and the lifter of my head.
Still, I wonder at His ways. I wonder at this path. If this is what it takes for me to discover more of who He is, then I want it to take its complete work. If it takes me feeling deep pain in order to feel the abundant life of the Kingdom and the healing power of the balm of Gilead, then God, bring on the pain. I want the death of Christ to be so worked into my life until all that people see is His life in me. If this heart ache is what I must walk through to write a book or to minister more deeply the heart of my Lover, then it’s worth it. If rejection and seemingly dashed dreams will produce a deeper well in my spirit, then it’s worth it. If the pain is creating in my heart a compassion that will love the most unlovely and go to the most broken, no matter where they may be found, it’s worth it. It’s worth it. At the end of this season, this part of the journey, I will be even more owned by God as bondservant who has CHOSEN Him, even in the hardest moments of my life. Bondservants change the world. And honestly, to be a true follower of someone, there have to be moments where the decision is hard, but you choose to remain walking in the path of the Leader. Otherwise, your following has no power to compel others to join because it has cost you nothing.
This is my stand, my position, my heart cry: that I could have more of Jesus. That I could see Him more brilliantly, more beautifully, more wonderfully than ever before. My position and statement of conviction in this wait is that God is brilliant and that He fights for His own. I can’t preach that to my generation if I don't believe it for my own life. He is growing me in wisdom and stature because He needs a warrior bride. He needs a Beloved who knows His voice and His movements. He doesn’t need anymore surface followers who run as cowards--only staying with him until it comes time to pray in Gethsemane and walk the path to Golgatha.
If these lessons are part of Him making me into someone who can stand in the midst of a godless University system and speak with a conviction that causes men to repent, then God, bring a deeper brokenness than I have ever known. If this is part of His warrior training, teaching me how to take nations and how to stand with the faith that David had when he stood as a young boy with 5 stones against Goliath, then Jesus, don’t stop working. Don’t make it easy.
Because if I've learned anything, it's in the hard times that I learn to burn. It's in the times that don't make sense that I learn to seek. It's in the disappointment that I learn how to trust anew.It's in abandonment that You come and teach me how to be a daughter. So I won't complain. Only rejoice. Only offer you thanks for all that You have done.
I want nations. I want that prostitute who is stuck in darkness and needs someone to come speak words of life that will break the chains. I want that orphan who has never known love or pure touch. I want that girl who got pregnant young and is about to get an abortion. I want the one who did get an abortion, and she’s living with the guilt of it. I want the drug addict on the street. I want the man who is in jail for life because he murdered someone—I want him to know that there is a Christ and a Lover who wants to change his life. I want the judge who is feeling the conviction of the Holy Spirit and is about to make some hard decisions that could ruin his career. I want the mom whose husband just walked out on her, and she’s left in tatters, wondering what this life is all about. I want that girl who is starving and cutting herself because she has no idea who she really is. I want that boy who his contemplating suicide. I want that homeless man who has never been told that he can have a future and a hope. I want that friend of mine who just got back to her dorm, totally wasted, trying to satisfy a deep longing that is in her heart. I want that boy who was sexually abused by a church leader—one who should have shown him pure love. I want that girl whose dad is addicted to pornography, and she’s become numb to what it means to be a treasure. I want that king who has the power to shift laws and decrees for whole nations.
I want them because God wants them.
His heart burns for them—longs to set them free—to break the bondages of the enemy who has come to steal, kill, and destroy. He groans just like He did when His children were under the bondage of Egypt. He cries under the weight of such oppression, and His intercession is for their freedom. How do I know? Because I’ve felt His heart break. I’ve watched his tears fall—and I’ve had precious moments where He let me cry with Him. Maybe you think I’m crazy, but I know what I’ve experienced in the Secret Place. I know that He wants to be my friend. He laughs too, but He also cries. And just like He needed Moses, He needs me. He needs you. He IS raising up deliverers—and He’s going to ask them to do some hard things because that’s what it costs. Laid down lovers are the ones who get nations. FOR FREEDOM IT IS WORTH THE SURRENDER OF MY LIFE. I want the kingdoms of this world to become the kingdoms of my Lord and of His Christ. And I need to come to a place of such abandonment that my life means nothing to me if I truly want to see God move through me to touch those who my heart feels burdened for in this season.
So God, bring on the processing. Just like Esther, who had the fragrances rubbed and scrubbed into her before she could smell like a queen, don’t let me think that You are mean because You won’t let me take the easy way. If God wants all of me that must mean that the reverse is also true—that He wants me to want all of Him.
God, I want all of You. ALL OF YOU. Not just the parts of You that make me feel good or comfortable. I want the parts of You that offend me. I want the You that shakes up my world-view and the way I see things. If that means another valley, let me walk it. If it means more time in the wilderness so I learn to seek you harder, then God, that’s what I want. Because You, my King, are worth it—all of it—all of me. The hopes, the dreams, the fears, the questions, the longings—I lay them at your feet. Because You are the dreamer of the ultimate dreams—and only when I start dreaming those pure dreams of heaven will I truly learn what it means to dream.
So I give to you my today. And my tomorrow. And the next ten years, twenty years, thirty years, forty, fifty, sixty, seventy, eighty years…after that. For however long you see fit to let me live and breathe on this earth, I give you those days. And work inside of me the God cry and the God hunger that sets people free.
21 years old. Someday I will understand. Someday, looking back on these trials and on this path God has taken me on, it will make sense. At the moment though, so many things are uncertain. So many of the puzzle pieces just don’t fit together in my mind—and it tempts me to cave into disappointment and to harden my heart from believing for the best and the most excellent way. I wonder about that—about this longing—about how easy it is for me to take my hands and try to make something happen—to reason with my own understanding instead of trusting the Creator who made me for His glory.
Yet in the uncertainty, I know that God is working. That’s not a lame attempt at trying to sound strong or spiritual. I really believe that because I’ve seen its truth throughout my life. It’s a conviction that I would die for—knowing that God is I AM and that I am the apple of His eye. He keeps the word He promises to me. He holds my life in His hands. His eyes watch my path and He guards me jealously as a shield about me and the lifter of my head.
Still, I wonder at His ways. I wonder at this path. If this is what it takes for me to discover more of who He is, then I want it to take its complete work. If it takes me feeling deep pain in order to feel the abundant life of the Kingdom and the healing power of the balm of Gilead, then God, bring on the pain. I want the death of Christ to be so worked into my life until all that people see is His life in me. If this heart ache is what I must walk through to write a book or to minister more deeply the heart of my Lover, then it’s worth it. If rejection and seemingly dashed dreams will produce a deeper well in my spirit, then it’s worth it. If the pain is creating in my heart a compassion that will love the most unlovely and go to the most broken, no matter where they may be found, it’s worth it. It’s worth it. At the end of this season, this part of the journey, I will be even more owned by God as bondservant who has CHOSEN Him, even in the hardest moments of my life. Bondservants change the world. And honestly, to be a true follower of someone, there have to be moments where the decision is hard, but you choose to remain walking in the path of the Leader. Otherwise, your following has no power to compel others to join because it has cost you nothing.
This is my stand, my position, my heart cry: that I could have more of Jesus. That I could see Him more brilliantly, more beautifully, more wonderfully than ever before. My position and statement of conviction in this wait is that God is brilliant and that He fights for His own. I can’t preach that to my generation if I don't believe it for my own life. He is growing me in wisdom and stature because He needs a warrior bride. He needs a Beloved who knows His voice and His movements. He doesn’t need anymore surface followers who run as cowards--only staying with him until it comes time to pray in Gethsemane and walk the path to Golgatha.
If these lessons are part of Him making me into someone who can stand in the midst of a godless University system and speak with a conviction that causes men to repent, then God, bring a deeper brokenness than I have ever known. If this is part of His warrior training, teaching me how to take nations and how to stand with the faith that David had when he stood as a young boy with 5 stones against Goliath, then Jesus, don’t stop working. Don’t make it easy.
Because if I've learned anything, it's in the hard times that I learn to burn. It's in the times that don't make sense that I learn to seek. It's in the disappointment that I learn how to trust anew.It's in abandonment that You come and teach me how to be a daughter. So I won't complain. Only rejoice. Only offer you thanks for all that You have done.
I want nations. I want that prostitute who is stuck in darkness and needs someone to come speak words of life that will break the chains. I want that orphan who has never known love or pure touch. I want that girl who got pregnant young and is about to get an abortion. I want the one who did get an abortion, and she’s living with the guilt of it. I want the drug addict on the street. I want the man who is in jail for life because he murdered someone—I want him to know that there is a Christ and a Lover who wants to change his life. I want the judge who is feeling the conviction of the Holy Spirit and is about to make some hard decisions that could ruin his career. I want the mom whose husband just walked out on her, and she’s left in tatters, wondering what this life is all about. I want that girl who is starving and cutting herself because she has no idea who she really is. I want that boy who his contemplating suicide. I want that homeless man who has never been told that he can have a future and a hope. I want that friend of mine who just got back to her dorm, totally wasted, trying to satisfy a deep longing that is in her heart. I want that boy who was sexually abused by a church leader—one who should have shown him pure love. I want that girl whose dad is addicted to pornography, and she’s become numb to what it means to be a treasure. I want that king who has the power to shift laws and decrees for whole nations.
I want them because God wants them.
His heart burns for them—longs to set them free—to break the bondages of the enemy who has come to steal, kill, and destroy. He groans just like He did when His children were under the bondage of Egypt. He cries under the weight of such oppression, and His intercession is for their freedom. How do I know? Because I’ve felt His heart break. I’ve watched his tears fall—and I’ve had precious moments where He let me cry with Him. Maybe you think I’m crazy, but I know what I’ve experienced in the Secret Place. I know that He wants to be my friend. He laughs too, but He also cries. And just like He needed Moses, He needs me. He needs you. He IS raising up deliverers—and He’s going to ask them to do some hard things because that’s what it costs. Laid down lovers are the ones who get nations. FOR FREEDOM IT IS WORTH THE SURRENDER OF MY LIFE. I want the kingdoms of this world to become the kingdoms of my Lord and of His Christ. And I need to come to a place of such abandonment that my life means nothing to me if I truly want to see God move through me to touch those who my heart feels burdened for in this season.
So God, bring on the processing. Just like Esther, who had the fragrances rubbed and scrubbed into her before she could smell like a queen, don’t let me think that You are mean because You won’t let me take the easy way. If God wants all of me that must mean that the reverse is also true—that He wants me to want all of Him.
God, I want all of You. ALL OF YOU. Not just the parts of You that make me feel good or comfortable. I want the parts of You that offend me. I want the You that shakes up my world-view and the way I see things. If that means another valley, let me walk it. If it means more time in the wilderness so I learn to seek you harder, then God, that’s what I want. Because You, my King, are worth it—all of it—all of me. The hopes, the dreams, the fears, the questions, the longings—I lay them at your feet. Because You are the dreamer of the ultimate dreams—and only when I start dreaming those pure dreams of heaven will I truly learn what it means to dream.
So I give to you my today. And my tomorrow. And the next ten years, twenty years, thirty years, forty, fifty, sixty, seventy, eighty years…after that. For however long you see fit to let me live and breathe on this earth, I give you those days. And work inside of me the God cry and the God hunger that sets people free.
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