In college, I seriously considered about ten different majors (and then jokingly considered about 20 more), ranging from strategic intelligence to international relations to spanish to journalism to biology/pre-med.  I finally settled on a journalism major, filmmaking minor, but it was quite the journey to even get to the point of declaring a major.

What may appear to be an "indecisive" nature hasn't changed much.  I don't know if it is a thirst for life or a lack of identity, but something in me wants to believe that I can learn everything that sparks an interest in me and that somehow, every passion will be incorporated into one big tapestry along the way.

There have been a few times in my life where I've thought, "If only I could live several lives!  Then maybe I could do it all: be an FBI agent, a novelist, a business owner, a sailor, Huckleberry Finn, a doctor, an actor, an olympic athlete, a lion tamer (not), write a screenplay, master a musical instrument and travel the world..." (and the list gets a bit more ridiculous the longer I think about it).  But a few days ago I was having a thought along those lines when it hit me how sad I would be to have to do life over again.  Not sad due to a loss of interest in all alternate life-stories, but sad because I would never want to live in a world where the people I love in this one life I've been given aren't there with me.

It gave me a new perspective.  Yes, it's fun to dream big and to imagine what can be packed into the blink of an eye.  Yet, in the end, what matters comes down to relationship.  To pursue 100 hobbies and maybe "master" a few, yet never cultivate rich relationships or offer yourself to another, would seem like a sad close to what could have been an incredible adventure.

And in that moment that was the culmination of lots of stress and worry over "how to spend the days of my life"in the most lasting and fulfilling way, I may have defined something that will impact the rest of my life.