"I swear when I grow up, I won't just buy you a rose.

I will buy the flower shop, and you will never be lonely.

Even if the sun stops waking up over the fields

I will not leave, I will not leave 'till it's our time.

So just take my hand, you know that I will never leave your side."

-Fun. "The Gambler" 

This whole month has flown by like a blur.  I remember the first day of April and the excitement I had in being able to finally quote Shakespeare, "The uncertain glory of an April day."  We are now at the last day of April, and the only marker I really have for months and days right now is the almost daily calculation of the day my grandma passed away.  Less than three months have passed and I am amazed at how grief and loss find ways to mark the calendar with their process.  


Now it is almost time for the May flowers and all the expectations that come with spring.  In between a new job as a barista, school, and balancing other random jobs, I haven't made time for contemplation or writing--things that I usually need for heart survival and health.  


Leave it up to a dear friend's wedding to bring you back to the beauty of the present and the possibilities of the future.


I just returned home from Virginia Beach, where I had the incredible honor of watching my friend Audrey become the gorgeous bride of the man of her dreams.  The culmination of a dream seems to lay in wait like a key, ready to open up a whole horizon of brand new dreams if we can only rest in God's goodness, His timing, His unmatched story writing, refusing the rush of a "have it now" society.  Maybe those brand new dreams were actually always present, but just couldn't be felt yet.  As I watched the couple exchange vows, I just felt wonder over the possibilities and adventures ahead for them now as a team--an incredibly well matched and beautiful team. 


God makes beautiful things out of us.  Always and forever.  


Now that the wedding is over and I have returned to real life, I feel an incredible sense of joy (minus the fact that I miss my friends terribly and wish we all lived closer to each other).  Maybe that happens when you get to be a part of watching someone you love enter into the sacredness of marriage after you know their back story and the sacrifices and faith involved in getting to that exchange of vows-- it realigns your heart into remembering how good and faithful God is to our lives and our hearts--it stirs up faith in His plan as the very best of fathers.  


So now to make some time today to just sit back and thank God for the present--and let Him know that I am indeed excited for all that He has in store.  


Best wishes to Audrey and Eric!