pick up a pen

take out paper.

dream big, even the big that is scary.

write it down.

teach them to long

“If you want to build a ship, don't drum up people together to collect wood and don't assign them tasks and work, but rather teach them to long for the endless immensity of the sea” ( Antoine de Saint-Exupery)

thank you, Audrey

‎"Perfect love is rare indeed - for to be a lover will require that you continually have the subtlety of the very wise, the flexibility of the child, the sensitivity of the artist, the understanding of the philosopher, the acceptance of the saint, the tolerance of the scholar and the fortitude of the certain." --Leo Buscaglia.

"Big thinking precedes great achievement." -Wilferd Peterson

Lessons with Anne

My time in Delaware is coming to an end. In less than two days I will pack up my car and head home, back into the unknown.

Next door to where I am staying lives an elderly lady named Anne. She has the most beautiful white hair and a smile that is so full of love. But don't let the smile fool you, because that lady has zero time for beating around the bush. She tells it to me like it is, and I love her for it.

Over the past few months I would stop in to see Anne--mostly to talk about Jesus with her and to catch up on life. I don't think I've experienced fellowship like that in a long time. Her relationship with Jesus is so real and so alive--and her discernment is right on, too. There were days when God would be dealing with me about something, and I would walk into her house and she would know exactly what was going on. Then we would pray, and I would feel things shift. I think she was part of the reason I made it through the past few months of hard work. Her prayers are potent.

Tonight I stopped by for the last time while living in Delaware. I went knowing that I may never see her again after this visit--until heaven. It was a night that I will not forget, one of conversation that was full of wisdom, as she shared with me stories from her years of experience. I felt like I was living in moments that gold could not purchase--it was that precious.

As I was about to leave, she gave me a gift. It was a picture of a geranium that she purchased years ago while living in Connecticut, from a local artist. This morning she found it and thought of me. I cried a bit. When I asked her about the type of flower, she said, "It's what you are. It can grow anywhere." I will never forget that moment of encouragement that brought such life to my spirit.

She said lots of other things--I need to dedicate a whole post to just her words of wisdom. But even without the words, her spirit delivers the message--one of freedom and of living life from the heart. I am so thankful that I met her on my journey. Her face is one that I will never forget.

psalm 119:32

"I shall run the way of Thy Commandments, for Thou wilt enlarge my heart."

Amplified says," I will not merely walk but I will run the way of your Commandments,

back from a hiatus

"the spirit of man is the lamp of the Lord, searching all the inner depths of his heart."
-proverbs 20:27

My blog hiatus is now over, and it may take some time to actually formulate words again. I'm sure there are many thoughts from the past month or so that will eventually make it onto the computer screen...

That being said, it's been a busy few months. My stint in politics is over, and I feel myself craving academia and art and adventure. I'm thrilled by the idea that there are no limits--that God is faithful to my heart because He's the one who formed it and placed dreams on the inside of me. Sometimes I wonder if the times He takes us through that are uncomfortable and "out of our element" are partly meant to remind us of what we are meant to do, creating an intensity inside of us that will pursue that call even when things get rough.

I wonder exactly what it means to have the inner depths of the heart searched out; if it is both a purging and a stirring. I'm sure that it is full of paradox, just like the Kingdom.

The purging of the last few months came at high levels of heat--working long hours in close quarters, seven days a week. There were times where I felt like I was observing myself from outside of myself, wondering what choices I would make and if I would pursue love. I failed multiple times, wondering if the prodigal child really does make it home to the Father in the end, scared that I would allow myself to harden up when things didn't go how I may have desired.

But God is faithful, and He is always there, ready to give a big hug. He gave me lots of hugs over the past few months, and for that I am still alive. :) Some of those hugs came in the form of real flesh--people who have become like family to me--people who I would give my life for if it was ever necessary. I don't think money can buy that kind of an experience; one where I am challenged to love more deeply and more fully--and where I get to experience that same kind of love from others. It's better than all the gold in the world.

There is so much more to write, I'm sure. It will come...

For now, I am just going where I feel the Holy Spirit lead, and I know that it will continue to be more than worth any sacrifice that must be paid.

God, thank you for your faithfulness.